But they didn’t see Bodhi’s face in Fiji. He was serious with his intent, and he meant every word of it.
I refuse to believe it and be hopeful or even expect a valid reason without talking to Bodhi first. I’m just not ready to do that quite yet.
What I need right now is a break.
I need to shop with my new friend and forget about my confused reality for a day.
Then, tomorrow, I’ll tackle the important things.
But for now, I’ll pretend they don’t exist and stay in my bubble.
Hopefully with a fat burger and bottomless fries.
35
BODHI
“Hey,can I talk to you for a sec?” I ask Penelope, finding her finishing up a workout in the home gym.
She leans forward on the weight bench to catch her breath. “Sure. What’s up?”
I knew this conversation was inevitable and I couldn’t wait any longer to make things right with my sister. Navy and Penelope just got back from a day of shopping and who the hell knows what else, so I figured now is my chance before the rest of the group comes over tonight for family dinner.
After all, Penelope isn’t here for much longer and I don’t know when I’ll see her next.
“You and Navy have fun today?” I ask her, taking a seat beside her on the bench.
She laughs before taking a chug of her water. “Yes. I ate my weight in french fries and loved every second of it.”
I smile. “Good. That’s good, Penelope.”
Setting the now empty water bottle down in front of her, she turns to me in question. “What’s up, Bodhi? You never corner me to talk like this.”
I don’t. I’m not sure I ever have.
I exhale deeply. “I know. There are some things I need to get off my chest.”
Fuck. I hope I can do this.
Penelope nods and waits for me to continue. She’s giving me a space to feel comfortable with her, something she’s always been good at.
“I owe you an apology,” I tell her as I reach for her hand. “I’m sorry for abandoning you after Mom left.”
“Bodhi—” She tries to speak up, but I hold my hand up to stop her.
“Please, P. Just let me finish.” She nods, signaling me to continue.
“Catching Mom with Uncle Chris was one of the hardest things for me. I hated her, Penelope. I hated her for cheating on Dad, and I hated her for ruining our family. That night when I got drunk with Gwendolyn, I felt numb. That was my goal, at least. I know how stupid getting behind the wheel was, and if I could take it back I would. But one thing I did that added another fuckup to my tombstone was abandoning you in the process.”
Tears begin to well in her eyes as she takes in my every word.
I continue, “It wasn’t intentional. You’re my sister and I love you more than I could ever explain, but I couldn’t know what happened to her. It was incredibly selfish and wrong of me to do to you. After all, you took care of Gwendolyn while I was locked up and that meant everything to me. But you never deserved me pushing you away. If anything, I should have been holding you closer. So, I’m sorry and I hope you’ll forgive me. I’d like for us to be close again.”
Penelope stands, and for a second, I think she’s gonna walk away, but she only walks to a shelf in the corner and grabs a clean rag to wipe her tears.
She sits back down and turns toward me. “I will always forgive you. There’s no forgive but not forget bullshit with us. The slate is wiped clean. You’re my brother and that means for life.”
She’s incredible. She’s selfless and forgives without question.