Page 209 of Swallow Your Sorries

“Have you finally given in?” Zedd asks before eating the spoonful of rice Stassi refuses. “Or have you brought us a sacrifice?”

My stomach falls into my ass and I try to wrench my hand from Gant’s again, but he only crushes my fingers so hard, my knees damn near buckle. Somehow Stassi mistakes this for a cute gesture because she clasps her own hands over her heart as if it were the most romantic thing she’s ever seen.

I try to slide onto the bench beside Aria just so I can sit and duck my head, but Gant won’t allow it. He swings me in front of him so that I’m forced to face the entire hall, and everyone in it. I want to lift my chin. I want to just take whatever’s coming my way. Haven’t I experienced far worse in the auditorium? And Gant wouldn’t pull another stunt like that just yet, right? Not when he still needs me to find the driver. But I can’t look up. I can’t face the faces that I know are filled with curious cruelness, just waiting for another show.

But then, I do manage to look someone in the eye. Rin of all people. She’s watching me calmly over her fork, and like Bae, she’s entirely unsurprised. Of course, she is, because she was right.

She stills at the sight of us and I focus on her, and I don’t know why. She’s the last person on the planet who’d help me, and yet, I’m locked in on her. She licks the molten lava cake off her fork, before putting it down and reaching for her phone instead, probably to record what’s coming.

A second later, just as Gant climbs onto the bench to start the circus, pings vibrate all around the room and all the tension flees from my body for one singular second.

Because Beaussip, or maybe Rin herself, has come to my rescue. Or not to my rescue, but to my aid because I’m still in hell, just a fresh one.

Maybe it’s for the best.

I got what I needed, after all. Gant’s private lessons gave me a major push and Mistress already informed me that I wouldn’t be demoted to the intermediate class. So what if I couldn’t rely on him for lessons anymore? I’m already in the pool. He got me into it. It’s time I doggy paddled on my own now.

Forget the bubble.

Forget the pretend play.

Forget Gant being your net.

It was a nice thought, but it would only stave off the inevitable.

Yes, this was the right thing to do. The right move to make.

Hold your chin high and prepare.

But that’s easier said than done because I’m not as much of a ragdoll as Gant thinks I am. Maybe I’m a hybrid because I’m starting to feel the cracks from my most recent fall. Falling inlikewith Gant Auclair. Now, I’m about to fall back into hate with him.

I watch as Stassi presses play like a hundred other students before squeezing my eyes shut.

“They’re little lambs and I’m merely their shepherd,”Gant’s voice filters from the speaker.

“Shepherds care about their sheep.”

“Until it’s time to sacrifice them.”

“You’d sacrifice your army for some pussy?”

“You think you’re just some pussy to me?”

I didn’t even need to listen to hear it. I watched the video a hundred times as I contemplated the perfect moment to release it.

Whispers, hisses, and even laughter drown out the audio for a few seconds before it’s back at max volume.

“Kesia—”

“Is a liar who uses dick riding to climb the social ladder. She wants to be like her master and head bitch, Rin. She wants to infiltrate our little circle. She wants to become untouchable before graduation. Last summer she bragged about fucking Bae, which is bullshit because he’s a virgin.”

I shouldn’t give a fuck about Gant’s lackeys who helped to destroy me but I can’t help but spare a glance at Bae. I’d just put his private business on blast too.

He doesn’t look remotely embarrassed though as he sips a black coffee. In fact, he’s staring at Rin’s table where Kesia is beet red.

My stomach and intestines twist and clench as I hear the start of my moans for less than a second and then there’s dead silence. I blink back down at Stassi’s screen, too cowardly to look up at Gant who’s still standing on the bench hovering above me, his fingers creeping into my hair.

Something’s wrong… Something’s missing…

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