Page 94 of Swallow Your Sorries

Fuck. She’s chosen a computer in the corner against the wall, so I can’t see her screen. Just the glow of the computer’s light bouncing off her stupid headband as she furiously types. Her eyes fly from the screen to the window constantly, and she’s rushing so much that she doesn’t even bother to sit. She’s hunching over the desk, clicking away with paranoid speed.

That’s my proof. Whatever she has opened on that screen is my proof that she’s Beaussip.

But how do I get to it?

How do I lure her out?

The question barely crosses my mind when the sound of rubbery soles squeaking down the hallway draws both Rin's and my attention and gives me the excuse that I need. Because Rin turns off the computer screen and runs from the lab to the tiny girls’ bathroom next door.

Obviously, she thinks it’s the librarian, and for a second I do too, given those orthopaedic heels that bank the corner, but it’s a student. The South Asian girl I’d sat next to during orientation.

Hunched over from her overweight backpack, she squeaks up to the corkboard, signs her name on the log-in sheet and enters the lab. And I enter directly behind her because I don’t give a fuck if Rin catches me, so long as I get the proof first.

Enaj blinks at me startled, but I breeze past her and turn Rin’s monitor back on. It’s easy to identify which screen is hers in the row of eight given that stupid ass cup she always totes around. She’d forgotten to carry it with her.

The moment I’m bathed in the soft blue glow of the monitor’s light, I’m hit with images and videos from all over campus. Hundreds, no,thousandsof them, all attachments and all in an email thread. I roll the cursor up, trying to skim the recipient’s email and the moment I do, the moment I read the letters B and E, the monitor glitches, and then it goes black.

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?”

I turn to Rin, who’s right by my ear. I hadn’t even heard her coming.

My eyes flash to Enaj, who’s just watching us timidly over her monitor.

Damn, we weren’t friends by a long shot, but we were scholarship sluts as everyone had pegged us. Shouldn’t that fragile bond count for something? Couldn’t she have cleared her throat or something to give me a heads-up?

“The same thing you are. Sticking my nose inside somebody else’s business,” I whisper. I didn’t want Enaj to overhear. I need as much leverage as possible and that includes secrecy.

Rin’s furious expression relaxes her lips curling into a smile like I’ve just said something funny but I’m not laughing.

“I know who and what you are.”

“A vampire?” She cocks her head and crosses her arms. “A wizard? You got me there.”

“Beaussip,” I hiss.

She actually bursts out laughing then, so hard she doubles over, her headband nearly slipping off her head. “You are so stupid. Even stupider than you look in ballet class.”

I don’t let her words shake me despite my stomach plummeting.

“And yet you can’t take your eyes off of me in class. Neither can Gant. So is that why you’re his head cheerleader?” I ask, lifting my chin. “Why do you ride his dick so hard? You think if you dox me enough, he’ll give you a crumb of attention?”

Shock is an understatement as she gawks at me, then once again she’s chuckling with laughter, tears brimming in her steely grey eyes. “I’m probably the only girl in our year who doesn’t want Gant’s psychotic attention.But you do. You look for him everywhere you go.”

“You would know. You’re always so concerned with what I’m doing. You’re just as obsessed as he is.”

“Don’t flatter yourself.” She drops her voice that’s suddenly serious. “You saw the photos. I’m obsessed with everyone and no one at all.”

At my wrinkled brow, she elaborates.

“I don’t give a fuck about you. Or Gant. Or why he’s willing to dethrone himself for some fire crotch. Or anyone else and their drama at this school besides my little sisters. What I do care about is content and when things are slow, I generate it. I don’t care if it inadvertently benefits someone else like Gant. It’s all for me.”

“So you’re a content farm and a snitch for Beaussip?”

“Ididn’t say that.”

“Why?” Rin’s filthy rich and it’s not like Beaussip openly acknowledges her contributions. She’s providing the information in secret, so what’s she gaining from it?

“Like I have to explain shit to you. You can’t prove anything.”

---