Page 55 of My Secret to Protect

I gasped, squeezing my eyes closed.

‘What time?’

‘I’m meeting the shipment at five am.’

He was giving me the information freely now, which I knew meant he trusted me to keep this to myself, and that gutted me. Knowing he was doing this and that if anything went wrong, I would know exactly what happened but not be able to talk to anybody about it. I hated that.

‘Where?’ I met his gaze with my watery eyes as his thumb stroked my cheek.

‘Right here.’

Turning to look out of the window at this spot that had become so special to us, I released a sob. I was afraid. I didn’t want him to do this.

‘Don’t do this, baby, please.’ I pleaded, and he brought my mouth to his.

‘Just a few days, pix, then it’s just me and you.’

His words against my lips before he kissed me like his life depended on it didn’t feel like goodbye and that confirmed in my mind what I had to do.

‘Arlo.’ He pulled back, giving me a little space to talk. ‘I lo…’

‘No—’ He cut me off, smiling softly. ‘Tell me when I get home.’

Pack Some Things. Lets Hustle

Bree

Twodays.Ihavebeen staying at Arlo’s place for two days, and I feel like I haven’t slept at all in that time. I hear things at night. Creaks and bangs, animals outside, the wind, the gentle roll of distant thunder, and every drop of rain that hits the ground in the dark. In my rational mind, I know those sounds. I recognize them and know they’re nothing to be afraid of, but I’m not being rational right now. I’m too tired for rational. I’m too scared, and those noises have been making my heart race and my throat constrict.

It’s hot, too. The summer nights are stifling, but I’m too afraid to open a window, and Arlo’s air conditioner isn’t working. He brought in a fan and said he’s going to look at it today, or at least I think that’s what he said. I’ve been so distracted that his words didn’t exactly sink in.

He’s playing the doting boyfriend in public. The second we’re out of the house, he holds my hand and kisses my temple, and the scent of him, the warmth of him, makes me want to cry. When we’re inside the house, he doesn’t touch me, he doesn’t talk to me like I’m his, but he takes care of me like I’m precious, and that is, well, it’s confusing. He puts on fresh coffee in the morning and gets my mug ready, he cooks, like every meal, he doesn’t even let me help him, and he walks around like a god in sweatpants or baggy shorts with no shirt on, and I can’t tear my eyes off the man. I watch him read and cook and train or play with Beans, and my heart runs away, imagining that this life together is real. I watch him work out and get all sweaty, andI’mthe one who needs to take a shower. I wish I could unpick this with Zoe and my coven, but I can’t discuss any of this with them.

The only other person I could talk to about this is my grandma, but I can’t call her up and be like,‘Hey, Grandma Dee, so I’ve seen Arlo’s dick swinging about in his joggers every hour of the past two days, and while I know that it’s pretty much the same length as my torso, I want to see if I can make it fit, what do you think?’

My girls and my brother have their own stuff going on, so much that once I told them I was staying at Arlo’s place, after some, ‘Are you sure you aren’t rushing this?’ messages from Doug and some ‘Get it girl!’ ones from my coven, they kind of just left me to it. I mean, I get it. I know they have no idea what’s really going on, but I’m lonely. I’m tired and stressed, afraid, a little horny, confused and lonely.

My cell vibrates on the nightstand, and I grab it, swallowing hard. I expect every message to be fromhimevery time my cell vibrates. I grab it with both hands and squeeze my eyes closed while I steady my heart rate enough to look. It isn’t him.

Jenna: Hey, boss, I’m heading in.

I take a deep inhale. Work. Right, I kind of forgot that was a thing. Jenna has been so patient, waiting for me to call her back in, but I haven’t. I just haven’t been able to face pulling on a uniform that means a little less to me these days. Protect and serve. I took an oath to do that, so did Nolan, and so did Chief Cane. How can I take my work seriously when a cop is doing this to me, when a cop didn’t take me seriously, when he failed to protect me, and when he all but laughed at my allegations?

Me: Okay, Jen. I’m sorry. I just need more time.

Jenna: Bree, I know you have a new guy, and I love that for you, but I need to know what is happening here. Am I about to be out of a job?

Fuck. Hanging my head, I chew my lip and start a reply.

Me: I’ll see you at work.

Afterashower,Ihead downstairs and find Arlo sitting out on the back porch, watching Beans chasing birds in the backyard. I watch quietly as the steam from his coffee rises and swirls into the morning air in front of his face, and he laughs at his dog, then takes a sip. He’s so beautiful. He’s not conventionally beautiful, not what you would see in a magazine or a runway show, but to me, he’s as perfect as he ever was. His dark blond hair is damp and pushed back, like he showered and ran his hands through it, and his side profile, which is all I’m gifted with right now, shows the bump in his nose that isn’t noticeable from the front. He didn’t used to have that, and it leaves me wondering when and how he broke his nose.

I pour myself a cup before stepping out onto the deck to join him.

He offers a passing glance, then goes back to his coffee.

‘I need to head into work. I have to go next door and get my uniform.’

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