Page 28 of Until the Stars Fall

I squeezed his hand once. “Yeah. Together.”

We were silent for a few moments. Vulnerability in a man was more attractive than I’d realized. I’d been so closed up with him, but he may as well know all my secrets.

“You asked me about my plush ride offworld with work,” I started. “I didn’t get a leave of absence. Actually, I’ll be lucky if they don’t have people waiting to arrest me when we land.”

He furrowed his brow and turned to me, looking both confused and slightly alarmed.

“And I don’t exactly work there anymore.” I took a deep breath and explained what happened in my boss’s office the morning I left San Francisco. The truth about it. As I spoke, his features expanded more and more in outrage. I ended my story with, “But you can’t tell anybody.”

“So that asshole assaulted you?”

“That’s what you’re taking away from it?” Protective male vengeance glimmered in his eyes, and I didn’t hate it. “He didn’t assault me. I wanted to kiss him. But instead, I wrecked his office and exposed him to the toxic San Francisco air. Busted a glass door, or two. I’m not looking forward to dealing with that when I get to Gaia.”

He turned back to the windows overhead. “Sounds like he had it coming. You were his employee, and he shouldn’t have come on to you.”

“He’s really a great guy, and his attention wasn’t unwelcome. And it was flattering to have the company heir interested in me. He’s tall, and cute, and smart. My work friend, Imani, never understood why I didn’t seem interested.”

“I’m just guessing here, but I’m thinking it’s because he was a dick?”

I smiled but ignored him. “Evander was the kind of guy my parents would’ve chosen for me. A wealthy scientist whose father was at the top of every circle: social, business, academic. Why wouldn’t I be interested?”

“Because he’s a predatory dick,” he stated flatly.

“Because I don’t date,” I blurted, watching his face for a reaction.

He nodded, but his face remained impassive. “Why’s that?”

God this was embarrassing, but I was the one who’d opened this door.

“I used to. I want to. But the longer I’ve been away from home, the more anxious I am, the worse my magic busts out at—” I paused, struggling with how to put this delicately. “Really inappropriate times. I haven’t been on a date in years.”

He nodded, still impassive. “You mean during sex.”

My whole body cringed, and my hand in his grew sweaty. “Yeah, that’s definitely...one of the times. Yep.” I fixed my eyes on space. “Maybe you can help me with that too?”

He lowered his eyebrows with a bemused sideways smile. “What exactly are you asking me for, Gemma?”

Heat shot up my face. “I meant by helping with my magic.” Could I crawl into a deep, hidden compartment of the ship? Jump out of an airlock?

He laughed. “Yeah, I can help. Like I said, when you’re using your magic in small ways, it doesn’t build up and bust out all at once in ways you don’t want it to.” He blinked and half shrugged, mischief all over his face. “Although magic during sex can be fun.”

The curve of his smile sent a visceral, desirous shiver through me. What was he thinking about over there? Because breaking things did not sound sexy to me, but the sudden throb between my legs wanted him to show me.

My hand in his felt slippery. He held it loosely, and I could’ve taken it back if I wanted to. But now I was mortified into indecision.

The silence lengthened. Did he think I was coming on to him? That I was testing the waters to see if he was interested in me? Was I?

“I mean, it’s not just the magic, that I don’t date. I don’t ever feel like I measure up in relationships. It’s exhausting. I’m probably better off alone.”

“What do you mean?”

Crap. Why did he have to be an emotionally mature man who was interested in what I had to say?

“I mean, if it wasn’t the magic, it was something else I wasn’t enough of. Depending on the guy, my hair wasn’t long enough, my stomach wasn’t flat enough, my boobs weren’t big enough. I don’t know if I’ll ever find love.”

His bright eyes turned to me. His nostrils flared slightly, betraying a touch of anger on an otherwise placid face. “Actual men have told you those things. About yourself.” More of a statement than a question.

It did seem kinda shitty, now that I said it out loud. “Not in those exact words, just the suggestions.” I deepened my voice in an unflattering mimic of a guy I’d had one date with when I first got to San Francisco. “‘Have you ever thought about getting a boob job, Gemma?’ That kind of thing.”

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