Page 76 of Booked for Summer

‘Then I’ll claim partial responsibility.’

‘Why?’ She forced herself to look at him again. ‘A week ago, my only purpose was a cheer-you-up fuck.’

He flinched, jaw muscle bunching. ‘You were getting under my skin, creeping under my guard. I… panicked.’ His shoulders rose and fell as he inhaled a deep, shaky breath. ‘I had to push you away.’

‘So why are you here now?’

‘To apologise.’ He cursed and rubbed at his face. ‘What I said was shitty, inexcusable, I know that. I don’t deserve another chance.’ His eyes lifted to hers. ‘But I want one.’

The tug on her heart, the one she didn’t want to feel? In that moment she’d have been grateful for it, because what she got instead was a full-blown yank. It terrified her how easily her heart forgave him. Like he’d just had to turn up and smile in her direction and it was ready to lie at his feet. Thank God, her head was smarter. ‘We don’t always get what we want. It wasn’t that long ago I asked if I could stay on at the bookstore for the whole of my contract and you said no, I could have two weeks.’

‘I told you, it’s yours until you go home.’

‘Yes, I remember you saying that. I also remember the next day you made me feel cheaper than anyone else has ever managed, and believe me, that’s one hell of an achievement.’ Anger burned inside her again, and she welcomed it,channelledit. ‘Did I tell you that my ex, Paul, thought it was okay not to let me know he was actually dating someone else while sleeping with me becauseI looked the type who wouldn’t mind?’ Liam’s face blanched and she let out a strangled laugh. ‘Yeah, such a charmer, but apparently, arseholes are my go-to type because he didn’t hurt me nearly as much as you did. I was trying to help,’ she hissed, on a roll now, a week’s worth of pent-up emotion bubbling over. ‘Not infiltrate your precious privacy, not try and wheedle my way into your life through your grandma.’ He looked like he might be sick, but she reminded herself she didn’t care. ‘God, the fact you thought I was the sort of person who would even do that.’ That had hurt most of all. Despite all the sweet things he’d said to her, he still actually thought she was some sort of scheming cow out to snare him through sex and his grandma.

* * *

He was losing her. Liam hadn’t realised how important it was that Jade gave him another chance, until he saw that chance slip through his fingers.

‘I didn’t think you were like that.’ He dragged a hand through his hair, feeling totally unbalanced, like he was swaying against the ropes after a few heavy punches. ‘Of course I didn’t think that.’ Taking a big risk she’d actually punch him, he stepped towards her, eyes pleading with her. ‘I told you, I panicked. You were doing this amazing, touching thing for the most important person in my life, and it suddenly felt too much, like I was in real danger of falling for you. Then there was Mary knowing something acutely personal about me, a woman who’s been part of the Haven-hating gossip machine that drove me and my grandma off this island… Fuck, Jade. For a few minutes I lost all sense of proportion.’

Her blue gaze raked his, like she was trying to get inside his head. Then she huffed out a breath and turned away from him, walking to pick up one of the caterpillars he’d insisted on, much to Jeremy’s amusement. ‘What do you want from me?’

Okay, this was the billion-dollar question. This was where he cut and ran, or stared fear in the face and decided she was worth making himself vulnerable for. Worth putting himself out there to be rejected again. ‘I want to date you.’

She gaped at him. ‘You don’t date.’

‘I used to. Then, like you, I was hurt, so I stopped.’ His heart was racing, his stomach felt like it was filled with grit. ‘But you’re special, Jade. I become a different person when I’m with you, a man who laughs, who talks about himself. Who’s starting to realise the impact of his actions and wants to change.’ Her eyes held his and she nodded, as if to sayyou have my attention,now convince me it’s something I want, too. ‘You only have two more months out here. I want to be selfish and spend them getting to know you more and maybe in doing that, I’ll also get to know myself more. The real me, not the bitter, closed off me I’ve become.’ His heart sank as he played back his words. ‘And that’s all about what I’ll get out of it, and not about how you can benefit.’

‘Don’t I get sex?’

He couldn’t read that look in her eye. ‘I don’t know if you’re teasing me, or throwing my words back at me.’ Frustrated, he jammed a hand into his pocket. ‘I get it, I’m a complicated mess. Why would you want to spend more time with me? Plus, with the way I’ve acted, you have no reason to trust me. But I’m trying to open up to you. Trying to offer you a version of me I thought I’d buried.’ Emotion balled in his throat and he struggled to keep his voice steady. ‘I won’t blame you if you think he’s not worth your while. Others have thought the same.’ Fuck, now he sounded pathetic. Angry with himself he inclined his head. ‘You’re here to work and I’ve taken up too much of your time. Good luck today. I hope it goes well.’

He turned and began to walk away, legs feeling stiff, like they’d forgotten how to move.

‘Wait.’

Heart thumping, he turned to face her. Blonde hair curling around her face, hands clutching a toy caterpillar wearing an inane grin, she looked stunning and sexy and… unsure. ‘I’ll be in the shop tomorrow. You know… if you want to find out how this event went?’

It was an olive branch, and he grasped it as if it was the last life raft. ‘Thank you, I will.’

He weaved his way back through the resort to his office, his legs unsteady. She hadn’t agreed to date him, but shehadn’t said no. Considering at one point he thought it was game over, he’d take that.

He pushed open the door to his office and slumped onto the chair, taking a moment to let the tiny victory settle over him. Yet as he went to turn his computer back on, his mind wouldn’t focus, his tangled emotions distracting him. He needed to unpick them, separate them into a different compartment in his brain, before he could carry on.

And there was only one person he knew who could help.

Climbing back to his feet, he marched towards Jeremy’s office, but the bastard wasn’t there. Unreasonably annoyed, he set off towards the beach bar, figuring he might find the man… Yep, there he was. Sitting as cool as you like at a table, glass of something tall and fruity in front of him.

‘Do I pay you to sit here?’

Jeremy glanced up at him. ‘You pay me to keep the guests happy, and as I’ve just waved goodbye to a couple of guests who were unhappy with their room as it was only a pool view and not a sea view as advertised, but are now deliriously happy, courtesy of a chat with yours truly, a couple of free rum punches and a promise of an upgrade to a suite, then yes. You pay me to sit here.’

‘Fine.’ He threw himself down on the chair opposite. ‘Ask me how it went with Jade.’

‘Ah.’ A slow smile crossed Jeremy’s face. ‘I like this new arrangement where you come to me for relationship advice.’

‘I’m not. I don’t.’ Aware they both knew he was lying, Liam slumped against the back of the chair. How had he gone from keeping his distance, to wanting to share every minute of the conversation he’d just had with Jade, in the hope Jeremy would see the same thread of encouragement he had? ‘I apologised, she listened, took apart my behaviour with a cool precision that made me feel two-foot tall. She didn’t say no, but she didn’t yes, either.’

---