Page 115 of Give Me Love

She turns to look at me. “Hey, baby boy.” She smiles and flips a piece of bacon over.

I took the locks off her door last night before I went to Red. She’s over the worst of it, but she could bolt at any minute, and honestly, I thought she would, but I can’t fucking force her to stay or keep her locked up forever.

I clear my throat. “Hey. Smells good.” I shut the door behind me and toss my keys and phone onto the counter, but then think better of it and slide my keys back off.

“You hungry?” she asks.

“Yeah, I could eat,” I reply, remembering that I’ve only had bourbon after a hard workout this morning.

“Good. Grab us two plates.”

“Where’s Lou?” I question as I do what she asks.

“Oh, she came by earlier.” She looks back at me with a shrug before turning around. “But we don’t need her here all the time. She has her own house to watch out for.”

I put the plates down. “Lou comes because she wants to and because she’s welcome. Anytime,” I say firmly.

“Yeah, well, you have me to watch out for you now. I can cook and clean up around here.” She removes the bacon from the pan and sets the pieces down on a napkin-covered plate. I study her as she grabs the pan and places it into the sink, rinsing it out before opening the microwave and taking out a bowl full of scrambled eggs.

“What happens when you leave?” I ask.

She stops what she’s doing and looks over at me. Her eyes wander between mine, and then she lifts her shoulder. “I thought I’d stay this time.” She fills our plates with food. “If that’s okay with you, of course. I mean, I could get a job and, like I said, help out around here. I even thought about volunteering to help people like me get clean.”

I grab her hands, stopping her. I hold them both in mine and bring them to my mouth while looking into her eyes. I love this woman. I’ve tried to hate her, I’ve tried to erase her from my life, but I’ve failed continuously. The thing that burns is she could hurt me the most.

She could erase me.

You have a choice to do drugs. No one is born an addict. It’s something you become by your actions. So, no, I don’t say drugs made my mom the way she is. She did this to herself. She chose to leave us. She chose to forget.

She chose to erase.

But right now, she’s choosing to stay and that… that gives me hope.

“I love you, Mom. This is your house. As long as you stay clean and want better for yourself, you’ll always have a place here with me.”

She swallows and tears well up in her eyes. I kiss her hands and she pulls them away. Wrapping them around my waist, she hugs me tight.

“You’ve always been the savior in this family, Bryce.”

I rest my chin on top of her head, hugging her back. She sniffs and lets me go. “Well, let’s eat before it all gets cold.”

_____________

I trade out jeans and a T-shirt for a suit and tie. I slide my phone into my pocket before placing my watch on my wrist and heading downstairs. Music beats, and the lights dance along with the people below me. The bar is full, and I already know the basement looks the same. Once I pass through the club and make my way to the back, I wait for the sliding wall to open and I step through. Ruby hands me a cigar and lights it for me as my eyes scan the room. I see Simon at the bar near the TVs, and Ben walks up to my left.

“Evening, boss.”

“Ben.” I nod.

“They’re over at the roulette table. They’ve been informed you would like to meet.”

I hit my smoke, looking in their direction. “Rough looking fucks.”

He chuckles. “Rougher life. They’ve got some stories to tell. All of them.”

“Well, let’s go get introduced,” I say, taking a step forward.

The men look my way when I near the table as though they can sense me. All of them are tattooed and mean as shit looking. Dressed in an all-black suit with slicked back hair, one of them stands from his seat.

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