Page 9 of Give Me Perfect Love

I’m so used to the quiet. I look up at the cloudless sky and wonder if I’ll see any stars tonight through the smog.

A small pang of something passes through me and I realize I’ll never, ever miss that man, but the field was my bed and the stars were my blanket many nights.

They both wrapped me in warmth and comfort, while listening to my prayers and dreams.

I will miss them and only them.

Lucy grabs the soft pack from the console between us and throws it onto my lap.

“Light me one of those, would ya? I can’t block the wind while driving.” I turn my nose up in disgust. “Come on, Kat. One puff ain’t gonna hurt ya. Don’t inhale.”

I sigh. I guess it’s the least I can do. I tap the bottom like I’ve seen the monster do a million times until one falls out. I bring the cigarette to my mouth, and it sticks to my top lip when I part them. It tastes like cardboard and mint.

Closing my lips, I grab the lighter and cuff the end of the filter. I flick the Bic and smoke fills my lungs. I let out a painful cough.

“Here,” I say, getting light-headed.

“I told you not to inhale,” she says.

“I promise I didn’t mean to.” I scrunch my face in disgust and feel my stomach turn.

She quickly grabs the cigarette and puffs, making flames shoot up from the end. I look down at the map in my hands, breathing in air that isn’t so fresh now.

“The apartment building is on the next road.” We pass through the red light and Lucy turns the car onto a road that makes me smile. Small trees are planted on the sidewalk and I notice a bird flying from one to the other. There’s a dog walker doing her best to control four dogs almost bigger than she. A jogger maneuvers around all of them, giving a small wave as he does.

We pull up to the curb and I step out of the car with my purse. My eyes shoot up the building in front of me. Red brick towers over my small frame. From here, I can see a green vine crawling its way up the side of the fire escapes. Someone walks out of a revolving glass door and I shake out my hands, shredding my nervousness. and head that way.

I see a girl around my age coming out of a room, with change in her hand.

I must look lost, because she says, “Can I help you?”

“Yeah, I called a little earlier about an apartment for rent.”

“Oh yes. Go on in the office and have a seat. I’m just grabbing a drink. Would you like one?”

“No, thanks.”

She’s gorgeous and all legs while I’m a sweaty mess with a windblown ponytail. The elevator dings and a few people step out. I give a polite smile before I walk into the small office.

Looking around at gray carpet and a simple brown desk with a few items covering it, I jump when she says, “Let’s go take a look then.” She smiles. “Scare ya?”

I clear my throat. “A little.” She cracks the lid to her orange Fanta and pulls a drawer out from the desk. Keys jingle in her hand and she hits her hip against the drawer as she takes a sip from her drink.

She swallows. “The first one is on the top floor.”

I nod as she hits the elevator button.

“You from the city?”

“No,” I reply, looking over at her.

“Me either,” she says. “I actually grew up in the country. But I live with my boyfriend, Cain, a little way from here.”

I give her a small smile, turning my eyes back to the doors in front of us.

“What about you?” she asks.

“What about me?”

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