Page 119 of Give Me Redemption

I bring my cigarette to my lips. “The fuck she doing there?” I haven’t really talked to the woman since she got out of the hospital. She’s called, but she’s also given me my space. She knows how I feel about her. I can’t say I hate her. She did give birth to me, but I’d never go out of my way for the woman.

“Lee called her.”

“What?” I ask, surprised. Pops would never go out of his way for her either, but it looks like she’s working her way into everyone’s good graces.

“Yeah. She’s been trying to feed me and shit.”

I scoff but don’t say anything. Leaning up, I flick my ashes into an empty beer bottle before getting off the arm of the couch and lifting the ash-filled bottle along with a few others from the table.

“You heard anything from Michelle?” she asks. I stop over the trash.

I love how she just slid that in. Like we would just casually talk about Dalton. I’ve never talked about Dalton with her, or anyone for that matter. My family has no idea how far back she and I go. To them, this is a newish relationship. To them, this should be easy for me.

Never talk to Dalton again and move on with my life.

But they don’t know how much I care about the girl.

“You mean Harlow?” I answer.

“Harlow?” she questions.

“Yeah.” I drop the bottle. It clashes with the others before settling in the bottom of the trash.

“She was using a fake name. Go figure. Her real name is Harlow Dalton.” I continue cleaning up with the smoke resting between my lips.

“So, you have spoken to her?” She crosses her arms, holding on to the glass with her fingers. I don’t care for her tone of voice, but I don’t feel like fighting with my brother’s girlfriend.

“You thought I wouldn’t?” I ask, dropping takeout boxes into the bin.

“What she did was unforgivable. I get you had some feelings for her, but there are other women out there you can catch feelings for.”

I take a drag from my smoke but choose to keep quiet. She thinks I can just shut this shit off.

There are other women I can catch feelings for. Like this is a goddamn choice.

“Do you agree?” she asks.

I give her a sideways glance. “You say it like it’s that easy.” Like I can snap my fingers and that’s it.

“What the hell do you mean? She put Bryce in jail. He may be going to prison. How much easier could it be?”

“She was doing her job,” I say, and I can’t believe I’m taking up for her, but fuck.

I can say things about Dalton all day. I can go over there and treat her like shit, but no one else is allowed to do that. They don’t know her like I do.

She’s messed up. She lost her sister when she was just a kid. Hell, the woman is still looking for her.

God, I want to pull my hair out. Why am I thinking like this? She lied to me.

Harrison cough laughs, anger clear in her voice. “You’re kidding me, right? Are you not mad?”

I turn my full attention to her. “Oh, I’m mad,” I say severely. “I’m so goddamn mad I can’t see straight.” Harrison has no idea what I’m going through. She has no idea what this feels like.

One minute, I want to go over to Dalton’s house and fall to my knees, telling her I’ll forget everything, just be with me.

The next, I want to go over there and punish her so she’ll never even think about doing what she did to me to another person.

It’s exhausting.

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