Page 32 of Genesis

God, whatamI doing?

I’m probably riding with one of the most dangerous guys in Postings, and yet, I’ve never felt safer. The only thing I’ve ever witnessed Danny doing was burn down a house, but the stories he told me when we were kids about the men he hung out with. I’m no fool. I know this boy has grown up right alongside them. You pick up things. You adapt to the environment you’re around.

Right now, Danny still has that boyish look, but I know one day, when I look at him, he’ll be far from it. He turns and a house comes into view.

“Where are we?” I ask.

He puts the car in park. “This is my place.”

“What? Your place?” I look back at the house. It’s older, needs some work, but it’s nice. It’s out in the middle of nowhere, surrounded by trees with a lake view. I wonder what it looks like during the day. It’s too dark to see every detail.

“How is this yours, Danny?”

“I bought it.”

“Well, I get that, but how?”

He bites his inner cheek, moving his eyes away from me. “I have money, Bexley. Lots of it, actually. Hell, I’ve been making it since I was thirteen and I haven’t bought much but clothes and this car.”

I narrow my eyes at him. “How do you have money, Danny? You don’t even have a job.”

“I have a job.”

“Where? Where is your job? What do you do?”

“I work for a guy named Moretti.”

“And what does this Moretti do?”

“Lots of things,” he says.

“Lots of illegal things?”

He shrugs. “What does it matter?”

I scoff. “What does it matter?” I widen my eyes in disbelief. “You could get in trouble. You could get caught and be sent off to prison or something.”

“I’m not going to get caught.”

“How do you know that?”

“Because I know. In this world, you don’t get caught unless you’re stupid.”

“Really?” I ask doubtfully. “And what you’re doing isn’t stupid?”

“Look, Bexley. This is who I am. This is my life. Is it dangerous?” He lifts his shoulder. “At times, yeah, but you know me. You know I love the thrill. I’m not changing for anyone. You can accept that and we can move forward, or I can take you home right now and you can forget I ever brought you here.”

I blink my eyes at him in the low-lit car. There’s a security light in the yard and the moon shines brightly through the tree line above us.

“So?” he says. “Which is it?”

“Just like that, I have to choose?”

“Yes,” he says.

“Jesus, Danny.” I shake my head and take in a breath, rubbing my hand across my forehead. I think about Samuel and how being with him would be so easy. Life would be safe, a little bubble of sweetness. Why am I here? Why did I get in the car with this guy?

You know why, my subconscious speaks up.