Page 74 of Living with Death

And I see him.

Azrael stands in the parking lot.

I stand, quickly walking toward him. “You bring him back!” I yell. He lifts his chin. I hit his chest, but he doesn’t falter. His jaw tightens, and his eyes darken. “You bring him back to me right now!” I hit him again, this time harder. Salty tears fall, stinging my face.

I make a move to hit him a third time, but he stops me, pain etched on his handsome face. He swallows, wrapping his hands around my fist. “That’s not the way this works.”

“Why did you do this?” I sob, yanking my hands from him. I bend, holding my stomach. I’m going to be sick. “Why would you do this to me?” I step away from him, wiping my face, red-hot anger ripping through my veins. I straighten my back.

“I want you to bring him back.”

“I can’t do that.”

“Bullshit. You took Cook. You bring him back.”

“Darling…”

“I’m not your fucking darling. I hate you.” The words came out before I could think not to say them.

Azrael flinches like I physically slapped him. I shake my head, my hands going to my face. I didn’t mean that. Of course, I didn’t. My gut twists in agony, and my heart melts inside my chest. The awful words I spat hang in the air between us.

Darkness folds around him. “There are rules for a reason, Mabel. Mortals are born, and they die. It’s the way.”

I scoff. “The way?” I look back at the store. Memories roll through my mind––a little red-haired kid running up to the door. I’d yank it open and yell Cook's name. He’d always give me some candy, smiling that bright smile. When I’d had a bad day at home, Cook would tell me to sit on the crate while we listened to some blues.“It’ll get the hurt out of ya,”he’d say.“Then we can share a pop and forget about the bad for a little while.”

So many memories.

And now it’s done.

My grandparents are gone, and now Cook,

the only people who loved and truly knew me.

I sniff, wiping at my face. Anxiety swarms in my stomach. “I suppose there’s nothing I can do then.”

Sadness shows in Azrael’s eyes, and he looks down. “I’m sorry.”

I sniff. “I better get back.”

He looks up at me, and a shimmer of hope appears. “I’d like to come with you.”

I swallow, my throat feeling raw, and I say the only thing I can now, “I need to be alone.”

And with that, I walk away.

Chapter Twenty-Four

Azrael

As I stand in the parking lot, watching her panic and weep, I wish for nothing more than to comfort her. Witnessing the pain etched on her face nearly brings me to my knees. I want to rip this world apart. If only I could snatch Cook’s soul back, I’d give it to her. But I don’t have the power to bring someone back. It’s beyond my control. How heartbreaking to stand by and watch as the love of your life crumbles before you, and you’re powerless to fix it.

Not only powerless but at fault.

She detests me, as she should. I’ve lied to her, tricked her, and, worst of all, taken someone from her whom she felt was the only family she had left. She doesn’t even know about the former yet, and I’m unsure how to tell her after this.

She’ll never speak to me again.

I’ve never loathed my existence more than I do at this moment. Before, I knew it was the way, but now, I’d give anything to be something other than what I am.

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