Page 123 of Not the Plan

“I’m sorry, Karim, but I have to ask. What’s with your hands? You seem really uncomfortable.”

He looked up at her, wistful.

“Blunt? Honest?” he asked.

“Yes,” she said, pressing her palms together between her knees.

“I’m trying not to touch you.”

She pulled in a ragged breath, her heart taking off. He didn’t hate her. Tears blurred her vision as her lower lip began to tremble.

“Isa?” he asked. “What’s wro—”

“Please stop,” she said, voice breaking. “Stop trying not to touch me.”

Their lips were together before Isadora knew she was moving. She’d been on one end of the couch, but in the next moment she was on the other, kissing him, perched on her knees. He’d turned toward her, pulling her to him.

“I-I’m so…so sorry,” she stuttered between kisses. “I’m so sorry, Karim.”

“No, Isa. Don’t—” He stopped speaking to crash his lips back into hers. He slid a hand up the back of her neck, cradling her head. The other spread across her lower back. “Don’t cry. It’s okay, it’s okay.”

“No…” She couldn’t stop kissing him long enough to say what she needed to, but she had to say what needed to be said.

“There’s no way you could have known what Julian was going to do. I should have known better, Karim.I’mthe one who failed. I was just like Laila.” She gulped down a sob. “I walked away from you; I didn’t listen. I was all ‘me me me.’ I’m so, so sorry, and I understand if you never forgive me.”

He jerked back like she’d slapped him.

“Never forgive you?” he asked.

“You shouldn’t.” She shrugged. “Not like I deserve you,” she whispered.

He cupped her face. “What did you just say?”

She couldn’t look at him. She took a breath to speak, but another sob slipped out.

“Isadora, please,” he whispered. “Did you just say you don’t deserve me?”

She nodded. Hot, fat tears rolled down her cheeks and over his thumbs. The deep breath he took wavered on his exhale.

“Is that what you really think?” he asked. “Or did someone else plant that idea in your head?”

She nodded. “I hurt you, Karim. I assumed the worst. And then last night, when I saw Daria’s tattoo? I was mortified. It was all clear, what Julian had done, how he’d set you up. I should have seen it. I should have trusted you. And before that, when I wasbeing horrible and not talking to you, you still supported me, still tried to help me reach my goal. How can I deserve someone who would do all that?”

He wiped her tears away and pulled her into his lap, arms tight around her.

“Please don’teversay that again. Hearing that breaks my heart because it’s something Laila wanted me to believe. And it wouldn’t surprise me one bit if it’s something your mother wants you to believe about yourself.”

Isadora needed a deep breath. Then another. His beautiful eyes were a little dark, clouded. He gently wiped her new tears.

“Does she know?” he asked.

“About us…breaking up?” she asked.

He nodded.

“She guessed. Called me from a landline at a hospital since I’d blocked her numbers. She caught me off guard. Said it’s what I get for siding with you over her.”

His sharp laugh made her jump. He shook his head.

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