Page 109 of Friends with Benefits

“What?”

“It’s bullshit. No one took my mom’s symptoms seriously for years. She dealt with so much pain before her diagnosis. And you! Youliterally had to get injuredbefore anyone took your pain seriously. I’m fine. I have zero concerning symptoms, according to my doctor. But I just get a free colonoscopy?”

Well.

Instead of messy, complicated job feelings, Evelyn’s getting messy, complicated health feelings.

Oops.

“Theodore.” Evelyn wipes his cheek, then wraps her arms around his neck. He’s not sure when he started crying. His nails dig into her shoulders and Theo doesn’t know how long they stay like this, how long their hearts smash into each other’s before she says, so soft, “This is why you couldn’t sleep last night.”

“Sorry I blamed you.”

“You can sleep through my snoring. I should’ve known.”

Evelyn takes his phone out of his hand and dials the number in the referral email. Doesn’t let go of his hand while she makes the appointment. Gives her name and phone number to the scheduling nurse as his emergency contact, smirks at him as she replieswifewhen asked for the nature of their relationship, then adds the date to her calendar. After his colonoscopy is booked, he admits to Evelyn that he didn’t process any of the scheduling nurse’s instructions.

“Just don’t google how to make the prep better. Nothing makes it better.”

“Cool.”

“I’m serious. Mixers just prolong theblech.”

“Can’t wait,” Theo deadpans, then speaks his most anxious brain thought out loud. “What if they find something?”

“Then at least we know,” Evelyn says with a simple shrug. “It’s always better. Knowing.”

We.

We.

We.

Theo presses his lips to her forehead, then stands and makes his way to the kitchen because he still needs a distraction and it still needs a deep cleaning. First, he fills and turns on the electric kettle before scrubbing the sink. Makes herbal tea. Hands a mug to her and he knows he should tell her, but he’s already emotionally exhausted from scheduling a colonoscopy and a part of him knows deep in his bones that one way or another everything will change and that freaks him out. It’s an excuse. Another terrible one. But his brain screamsAvoid, avoid, avoidas he scrubs the kitchen until his fingers prune and continues to live in the delusion that a universe exists where he can get the job and keep the woman. As if she’s even his to keep. When he returns to the couch, Evelyn’s lightly snoring. Theo refreshes his inbox, and the email he’s been waiting on has arrived.

“Ev?”

She doesn’t stir.

Theo schedules his second interview.

Later, in the middle of the night, she climbs into his bed.

Theo is so sleepily delighted when her ice-cold toes brush against his calf. “Hey.”

“Sorry,” she whispers.

“Don’t be.”

He makes space. Evelyn curls around him, the big spoon, her arm draped across his torso. He takes her hand and brings it to his mouth. She sighs. He rolls over. Faces her. Their foreheads touch. Kissing her, Theo cannot imagine a universe in which he moves back to New York without her. He can’t believe they wasted so much time pushing, denying, insisting that anything about their relationship is platonic. As if this wasn’t inevitable. Them.

She whispers against his mouth, “We aren’t supposed to need each other like this.”

“Ev.” Theo’s exhale is a soft chuckle. “When haven’t we needed each other like this?”

23

Evie spends the next two weeks tangled up in her three favorite things.

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