Page 116 of Friends with Benefits

They’re okay.

Theo can be okay.

24

Theo throws back a “Honey I’m Home”-a Paloma like a shot, not a themed cocktail meant to be nursed. Micah and Pranav are hosting a housewarming party at their West Hollywood condo. It’s a two-bedroom in an elevator building, with an open floor plan that has plenty of natural light for Micah’s plants, furnished with an eclectic mix of contemporary and vintage pieces that somehow all work together. Theo counts the attendees, who range from casual acquaintances to total strangers, then stops at twenty-five and marvels at the fact that over twenty-five people can exist in this space and there’s still room to breathe.How?He pours another Paloma. Theo sat in traffic for an hour. Alone, because Evelyn needs a beat. It’s been a week and he’s not sure what pisses him off more—that he didn’t tell her sooner or that she reacted just how he knew she would. He stops thinking about it the moment the tequila burns hot in his throat.

“Cohen!” Pranav embraces Theo, positively glowing in homeownership. “You made it!”

“Wouldn’t miss it,” Theo says, handing him Trader Joe’s most expensive bottle of wine. “This space is awesome.”

“Is this you forfeiting, Singh?” an unfamiliar voice yells from the living room, where a chessboard is set up, midgame. “Smart move!”

“I will never surrender!” Pranav bellows, then looks at Theo. “Excuse me.”

“Garrett’s been a grand master since he was, like, ten.” Theo’s eyes shift to a woman standing at the opposite end of the island, who’s scanning the wine selection before ultimately selecting a bottle of red. “Pranav’s pretty screwed.”

Theo tips his cocktail. “But we love his delusion.”

“We sure do.” The woman laughs, clinking her wineglass against his. Tattoos cover her left arm, a fine-line botanical sleeve. He’d compliment them, if he were to flirt with her. Or her eyes. They’re pretty. Objectively. Clear blue, rimmed with gold charcoal. She’s dressed in low-rise jeans and a black tube top, the ends of her brunette bob skimming her shoulders. “I’m Claire.”

“I’m married.”

Claire smirks. “And I’m a lesbian.”

Theo nods.

He needs to cool it with the fruity cocktails.

“Fuck.” He runs a hand through his hair, then holds it out. “Theo.”

Claire works in ad sales at the same company as Pranav, but her dream is to be a stand-up comedian. She introduces herself not to flirt with Theo, but to tell him that she has a monthly stand-up show at the Elysian and to pass him a card with her Instagram handle and a QR code linking to her performance schedule.

“This isn’t a networking event, Claire-Bear,” Micah chastises, appearing out of nowhere, then booping her on the nose after he puts down the stack of catering trays. “We talked about this.”

“And I hear you!” Claire says, then sips her wine. “I do. But then I merely saidhelloto this man and he needed to inform me of his marital status.” Micah’s cackle is so loud, it interrupts her defense. “What’s for dinner?”

“Chipotle,” Micah says, eyes crinkling in the corners. “In all fairness, if I had a face like Theo’s, I’d also assume everyone wants to fuck me.”

“Fuck off.”

Micah boops him. “Nope.”

Theo stands to help set up the buffet as if they’re still roommates, as if he knows where the cutlery is. He doesn’t. So he removes the foil from the trays. Makes himself useful as Claire and Micah continue to roast him and he should’ve stayed home… except being home right now is unbearable.

“Where’s Evie?” Micah asks.

“Home.” Theo dips a chip in the bowl of guac. “She needs a beat.”

Claire’s brow furrows. “A beat?”

“Come again?” Micah asks.

“It’s my fault.” A small floof presses against Theo’s calf, sending his gaze down to the twelve-pound menace he misses so much. “Hey, Puck.” Puck hisses when Theo bends down, scoops him into his arms, and cradles him like a baby. “I sort of got offered a job in New York… and never told her I applied for a job in New York?”

Claire blinks. “Wait. You applied for a job in New Yorkwithout telling your wife?”

The crowd that has circled around Pranav and Garrettroars. It gives Claire an out, who swipes her wineglass off the counter, mutters, “Men,” under her breath, then gravitates toward the commotion just as Pranav squeals, “Shit! Am Iwinning?” Theo is curious enough to join, more than happy not to discuss the beat that’s taken over his life. But Micah keeps him in the kitchen.

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