Page 51 of Deadlier Obsessions

I stare at her with what I’m sure would be a bewildered expression if she was actually looking at me. “What?”

It seems to take forever for her to elaborate, and for a minute I think I simply can’t hear her over my thundering heartbeat echoing in my eardrums. “I think it would be better if I just go,” she says, barely over a whisper.

This is it, this is the moment when my entire world comes crashing the fuck down. I can’t lose her.Wecan’t lose her. I probably should’ve let Sebastian come in here instead of me, because as sure as it rains in London, I’m going to fuck this up beyond belief. Still, knowing that, I can’t walk away from her. The ball is already in play and if I leave this room, I think there’s no chance of saving anything. Fuck.

“Why do you think it would be better if you go?”

She shrugs her shoulders. “Mav has Lucy. You have Sebastian. I’m just an extra hole to fuck. Don’t I deserve more than that, Gage?”

Standing up, I sit beside her on the bed and wrap my arms around her and pull her reluctant body toward me and against my chest. “How could you possibly think that, baby? At first yeah, that’s what all three of you were, but we’re so much more than that now, Stella.”

She sobs against my shirt, getting the material wet with her tears. “You have him. Mav has Lucy. I have no one. I’m just the third wheel.”

Now is clearly not the time to correct her, by saying she meansfifthwheel. It’s also not the time to tell her she isn’t fucking going anywhere, although she’s not. I don’t want her here out of force. In order for us to be a permanent family, everything has to be consensual.

Lifting her chin, I tilt her head back gently. “Baby, look at me.”

Her lashes flutter, as she opens her reddened eyes that make my heart sink. “Stella, I love you. This doesn’t work without you. You are not just a hole to fuck. Jesus baby, we’re in Paris because I’m fucking crazy about your goddamn smile. I’d do anything to see it. The way your eyes light up when you’re so fucking happy, it’s addictive. It makes me feel things I wasn’t sure I ever could. The reason I keep taking down the pirate sites is because it hurts you, and what hurts you, hurts me.”

Leaning in, I press my lips to her salty ones, tasting her slowly as she pushes her tongue into my mouth. Wrapping her hair around my fists, I move her head slightly to the side, changing the angle of our kiss, deepening it, wanting to prove to her how much I need her. Lying her down on the bed, I get on it beside her as she rolls her eyes. “Yeah, I know the drill. You want to fuck.”

Shaking my head, I say, “Soon maybe, because I can’t get enough of you, but right now I want to hold you, if that’s okay.”

I close my arms around her and pull her into me. “Stella, I’m sorry about what I said before. That was a dick thing to say.”

She speaks low like she’s afraid someone will overhear. “It was, but what if you were right?”

“Baby, are you pregnant?”

Stella giggles, the vibration of it shaking my chest. “I have no idea. I’m only three days late.”

I kiss the top of her head. “Is that still what you want?”

Sighing against my chest, she admits, “It really is, but I’m terrified of everything right now. All of us together. How will we make it work long term? Am I enough? Will I be a terrible mother?”

“That’s a lot to unpack, gorgeous girl. We will make it work by being there for each other. Everybody here loves one another in some way. Even Mav. I love him like a brother. Are you enough? Oh baby, if there was one thing I could change about you, then you’d see how fucking perfect you are. As far as the kind of mother you’ll be an amazing one, because you have so much love to give.”

She nuzzles her face into my neck. “Who knew you could be so sweet, Gage?”

I don’t have an answer for that question, but I sure as fuck didn’t know. I’m an asshole by nature, but whatever they need I’ll give them, and this is what she needs right now.

“Why haven’t you taken a test?”

Sighing again, she says, “Because that’s probably what terrifies me the most. I’m not sure I could handle the heartbreak.”

LUCY

I’m doing it again, aren’t I? Ruining things for everyone with my selfish wants. Do I really need to see my parents again, face to face, to tell them this? Is Stella, right? I can’t answer that on my own, so I speak up, addressing Sebastian and Mav, because Gage has followed Stella, and I really hope he doesn’t make things worse. My girl’s hurting, and I wish I knew how to help her, but maybe I’m not the one who can.

“Am I being a twat here, guys? Should I do what Stella said and just tell them over the phone?”

Mav and Sebastian exchange a look before they both shrug.

“Honestly?” Mav asks, and I nod, knowing what’s coming. “It’s up to you. Do I want to see those assholes again? Do I want to watch and hear them hurting you again? Do I want to spend the whole time trying to keep Pretty Boy and Gage from killing them?”

Sebastian snorts, moving closer to us on the sofa. “That’d be no, no, and no, right, Mav? You do get that it’s not going to change their feelings for any of us, right, Lucy? Do you really want to go through that again? It was hell for us to see you being in that hell because of them. Can I suggest an alternative?” We both wait with bated breath for Sebastian’s pearl of wisdom.

“Video call. You can see their faces, but you won’t be trapped in a house with them, and you can end the call if they’re being cruel again. Likewise, none of us can reach through a video and tear their heads off, so it’s a win-win.”

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