Page 61 of Deprivation

“Oh, it was great. We had an amazing time. Have you been?”

“No. I haven’t traveled as much as I’d like. I’m afraid I’ve become a slave to the job.” It dawns on me there’s more truth here than I’d like to admit. Was I in a constant hunt for the almighty dollar, or simply trying to stay perpetually busy so I wouldn’t notice how empty my life had become? Raised in a modest lifestyle, I learned to be comfortable with what we had. So, I have to face the latter is the more likely culprit. Avoidance.

“Do you have a girlfriend?” Sara interrupts my internal dialogue.

As I’m about to say no, I hear familiar voices. Looking to the back-right corner of the bar, Huggie, The Hammer, and Mark are at a long table facing me. Across from them with their backs to me, I recognize Jake, Nate, and Ms. Katarina Kelly. The brunette has her hair in a high pony tail, but I know without a shadow of a doubt it’s her.

Clearing her throat, I turn back to my temporary companion and complete my answer. “No. Haven’t found the right girl yet.” Uproarious laughter spills from the corner, and I can’t help but look back at her. Shaking my head, admitting defeat, I return my attention to this friendly young woman.

“You sure? Seems to me someone has your eye.”

Standing taller, I ponder what I’ve done to give myself away.

“You haven’t been able to stop looking at her.”

“Yeah, well, it’s a long story, but I ruined any chance I had with her weeks ago, and now she won’t give me the time of day,” I admit, shocking myself with my honesty. Now, I’ve apparently morphed from a teenaged boy into a teenaged girl.

Feeling her hand slide onto my forearm in consolation, she pushes forward. “You’re a good-looking guy and seem incredibly genuine. I bet if you tried a little harder…” She appears to hesitate. “Look, Nick, some girls need to know how important they are. That they’re worth the extra mile. If you really did something to upset her, work for it. Grovel a little. You seem nice to me. She might come around.”

Problem is, she doesn’t wantnice. She wants Sebastian.As I look back to where she’s sitting, I notice Kat watching me over her left shoulder. I instantly pull my arm away from Sara and pray Rick will quickly return from the restroom. I don’t need to give Kat another reason to dislike me. But it’s too late. I watch as she gives me the stink eye and returns her attention to her friends. Again, I notice Mark is wearing the look of a man possessed.I should know. He regards Kat with domineering scrutiny before his scornful eyes flash my direction. Does he know what I did, how I treated her? This night has gone to shit. I’m ready to go.

* * *

Kat

“Come on, Kat, give me a chance?” I hear Mark say. “We’d have a great time you and me.”

It’s odd really, that I don’t have more experience with this. Yet I really haven’t had many opportunities to reject the opposite sex. Mark is good-looking and seems like a nice enough guy, however, I know from spending time in his company that he’s a self-proclaimed player. Why would I want to walk into that? Plus, ‘You don’t shit where you eat,’ or so one of these firefighters would spout. I don’t want to date anyone in this circle. It’d only complicate things if it didn’t work out.

“Mark, I know we’d have a great time. We already do. I don’t want to mess that up. I’m not the kind of girl you’d want to date,” I reassure him. “I’m clingy and paranoid and tend to run off all the men I go out with.”

Hearing the door open, knowing Marty Street is due to join us, I look over my left shoulder to peek at the entrance when I see Nick Barnes, Casanova surgeon extraordinaire, flirting with a fifth woman.Man, is he going for some sort of record?Not realizing I’m staring I shift my gaze and flinch as our eyes meet. I watch as he pulls his arm away from the pretty, young blonde he’s with. His eyes appear to plead with me, but for what? It’s clear I was right about him. He has a girl in every bar.Well, count me out.

Twisting back around to my friends, I take a long pull from my beer. It’s not as refreshing as it had been. My evening, and apparently my beer, have turned sour. Why am I giving him this much power over me? Unable to help myself, I look back over my shoulder one last time to find he’s no longer there. Instead, there’s a handsome, well-built male with copper hair seated on the stool vacated by Nick. This same man is kissing the blonde who was touching Nick’s arm earlier. I start to contemplate whether this girl is a professional escort, until I notice the glimmer of light emanating from the large rock on her left ring finger.Wait a minute… Could I have this wrong? Were the others his dates?Biting my lip in stern consternation, I wonder whether I’ve misjudged him.What did it matter? You’re avoiding him and his rude ass behavior.Even if he did say he was sorry.

* * *

Hours later, I’ve showered and settled in for the night. By our standards, it’s still early, only 10:00 p.m. I feel my phone buzz.

“Hey, Liv.”

“Hi, Kat. I’m sorry to call so late, but I need to ask you something.”

“Of course. Whatever you need, ask away.”

“Well, don’t feel pressured. You can say no. And if my asking is going to make you feel at all uncomfortable, please let me know.”

“Liv, you’re making me a little uncomfortable now. Please tell me you and Mac aren’t looking for a threesome.”

“Ha. Oh, my god, Kat. No, crazy. I just wanted to ask if you’d be my maid of honor.”

“Of course, Liv. I’d be honored. You just had me worried with that buildup.”

“Oh, thank goodness. I was worried with your history and your decision to avoid dating… I just didn’t want to put you in a position that made you miserable.”

“You know I’d do anything for you. And I love Mac. I’m excited for both of you. Just because my life is shit doesn’t mean I won’t help you celebrate yours. Just email me a list of what you need help with.”

“Thanks, Kat. I couldn’t imagine anyone else standing up for me on my special day. Look, I’ll let you go. We need to meet up soon.”

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