Page 75 of Deprivation

I hand him my phone with some hesitation. “Okay, so no comments on my obvious lack of smooth pickup lines with women,” I scold. I watch as he puts down his spoon, reaches for the phone, and without a word devours each message. Abruptly, his head flies up to meet mine, and he breaks out laughing.

“I know, I know. It’s ridiculous. I definitely need to work on my skills with women. In hindsight, I don’t know that I even understand what was happening.”

“I think I might,” Dad hoots. “Bring your soup, we can eat in the den. I want to show you something.”

Following along behind him, I watch as he turns on the television and selects the Netflix app. Really? He wants to watch a movie in the middle of lunch? That’s odd, but okay. “Boss Baby, Dad? You couldn’t find an old Bond flick orMission Impossibleor something?”

“I’m an old man. I still like action and adventure, butBoss Babywas good. Humor me, will you?”

* * *

Later, as the credits begin to roll. I sit completely puzzled. So is Kat a completeBoss Babyfan to have quoted all of those lines? Hell, my dad watches the movie, so I can’t be too surprised. Was she drunk? I have a hard time picturing Katarina drinking and watchingBoss Baby.

“Do you know what she was doing when you two were texting?”

“No. You saw it. There wasn’t a lot of meaningful conversation happening during that text match.”

“Well, that could be a conversation opener. I’d ask her. I bet there’s a story there.”

“Oh, there’s a story all right,” I reply. I’ve replayed that night over and over again in my mind. The best night of my life. It was as if I’d wished for Katarina all dressed up for me in sexy stockings and under things and blown out a candle. The best birthday gift ever. It was the hottest sex of my life under that big beautiful tree, and I’ll never forget it. The only downside was letting her run off. Honestly, I think reliving the reckless abandon with which we fucked each other is why I cannot let this go. What’s more, I’ve made a habit of not getting attached. I didn’t bring women home. I just walked away. But I never considered she’d do that to me. After a night like that, she simply walked away and didn’t look back. No mention of it, as if it never even happened.

It was bad enough before. Denying myself the chance to pursue this exquisite creature for fear I’d get in over my head, merely to lose her. The temptation had been torture. But nothing like the deprivation of having her and watching her walk away. I’ve never felt this before. Not with Sophia, not with anyone. Dad was right, life’s too short. I have to get her back.

* * *

Kat

I shouldn’t have done it. What had I been thinking? Caught up in the adrenalin of witnessing the birth of Katrina’s baby, I accepted an invitation to go out for drinks with Mark. “A date,” he corrected, which was strange given Mark didn’t date. He had conquests. This wasn’t smart. I didn’t want to date anyone from my small circle of friends. It was too messy.

But how long has it been since I’ve actually been on a date? How many more weddings and baby showers will I attend as a bystander? It’s bad enough I’ve been deprived a good night’s sleep and an orgasm delivered by another human being for all these years, but did I also have to endure the utter deprivation that came with a life spent alone? No hand to hold, no soft caresses in the dark, no whispered I love you.

Unsure how I’d fallen into this tangent, I redirect to the task at hand. I’m heading to Target to pick up a few things and then I’ll return home to prepare for mydate. I need to look for an opportunity to inform Mark this date isn’t going anywhere, because I already know I’m not interested in more. It’s nothing personal. There’s just no spark. We shared something special in the ER with Katrina. I agree, that could be worthy of a date. But only one.

* * *

An hour later, I’m perusing the many offerings in the Target shampoo aisle when I sense I’m being watched. I don’t know why I bother considering these other brands, as I always return to the coconut scent I’ve enjoyed since my youth. Looking up and to my left, I notice none other than Nick Barnes walking in my direction. He’s dressed casually in jeans and a hunter green Henley that hugs his muscular torso like a glove. Again, I feel my mouth water as I’m entranced by the delicious arm porn that’s on display. I watch as a breathtaking smile crosses his face as he approaches. Shocked at this unexpected surprise, as well as my adrenalin pumping reaction to it, I grin up at him.God, he’s beautiful.

Mesmerized, “Hi” is all I can get out.

“Hi, yourself.” I watch as he clears his throat and appears to look a bit nervous. This is unlike the man I’ve grown accustomed to fantasizing about. “I’ve been thinking about you,” he says, the deep, rich timbre of his voice making me tremble a bit.

“What?” I reply, unable to keep the complete jolt of disbelief from crossing my face. He’s just radiant. How could he be so nice to me after everything I said to him?

“Yeah. I… I wanted to apologize.”

“You?”Lord, I can’t get out more than one word at a time. It’s like my early twenties have reinhabited my body.But what on Earth did he have to apologize for? I’m the nut job who went off onhim.

“I know I came off as a haughty, self-absorbed jerk the other day. I’m insanely aware of how bad my game is. I wanted to ask you out for a drink and was trying to be smooth. I’m sorry. I promise I’m not as bad as I’ve come across. We’ve really had the worst first encounters on the planet. Is there a way to call a mulligan and have another shot? I’d really love to take you out for drinks tonight. If you’re free.” He fires each sentence out rapid fire, my mind unable to fully absorb all he’s just said.

Staring up at him blankly, I realize he’s awaiting an answer.God, I’d give anything to be having drinks with him tonight instead of Mark.My face falls in remembrance of my evening plans. “I’m sorry. I can’t. I have other plans,” I reply, looking down at my empty red plastic shopping basket, hoping a magic genie will appear and tell me how to get out of this date with Mark.

Looking back up, I notice his face goes from hopeful to blank in an instant. Trying to calculate how I can obtain a rain check from this apologetic, sexy man, he interrupts “Oh, yeah. Sure. I mean, it’s last minute and everything. I’ll see you, Kat.” He quickly turns and walks away before I can utter one word in response.

Standing there, speechless, I turn back to the shampoos shrouded in disappointment. I have even less interest in considering a different option than my norm now.Unless, maybe I can find something pungent to detract any advances from Mark.

Unable to shake what’s just happened, I contemplate the situation. Should I run after him? He was quite sweet just now. You’d never know this was the same Dr. Broody who went out of his way to aggravate me.

Gliding my thumb along my lower lip, I try to consider my options. Before I can develop a plan, I’m unexpectedly spun around. My shopping basket falls to the floor with a clatter and I instinctively lift my arms in front of me to defend myself as strong arms wrap around me, lifting me against the shelves. Several bottles tumble forward as I feel soft, full lips crush mine. His warm, wet mouth tastes of desire and longing, a dish I’m starving for.

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