Page 4 of Fractured

“No. I need some time off now. The counselor I’m seeing recommended I take a bit of a sabbatical to get myself together.”

“What the hell, Kat?” he blurts.Man, I knew it was going to be tough to get the time off, but I didn’t expect him to get mad about it.“What’s going on that you need extended time off? Are you okay?” He sounds more concerned than angry.

Unable to control my unease any longer, my voice starts to quiver into the phone. “Jake, I’m losing it. I feel like a crazy person. I was hoping I could take these next few days and pull myself together, but I feel unhinged.” I start to whimper into the phone.

“That’s it, Kat. I’ll be there in thirty minutes.”

“No…” I realize it’s useless to argue as the line is dead, and I’m sure he’s already headed in my direction. I walk to the bathroom to take a quick shower and change my clothes before he arrives. This conversation will be uncomfortable enough without the added layer of sweaty gym clothes and body odor.

* * *

Approximately forty minutes later, I hear an aggressive pounding at the door. As I approach, I see the troubled face of my dear friend peering into the narrow window that abuts my front door. Opening the door wide, I step back to let him in. Jake is a few inches taller than I am, about 5’11. He has a broad chest, muscular build, and intense dark eyes that are more dramatic when he’s in a serious or anxious mood. Even working in emergency medicine, I don’t see that side of him often. He’s usually a teddy bear. His alarmed state has me feeling a bit agitated. How do you tell someone you love and respect that you’re losing your faculties?

“Okay, Kat. Take a seat. Tell me what the hell is going on.”

Taking a fortifying breath, I begin as calmly as I’m able. “Okay, where to start. Well, I started to use the pills you wrote for me, and my sleep seemed to be getting better. I wasn’t having night terrors any longer, but some of the dreams I had were a bit on the crazy side. At first, I just laughed them off as if they were artsy independent films at the Biograph or something. But crazy stuff started happening.” I look up to see if his expression has changed at all.

“What kind of crazy stuff?” he encourages, waving his hand to continue.

“Well, I started waking up, and things weren’t like I remembered when I went to bed. Like, once, I woke up buck naked.”

“Kat, a lot of people sleep naked.”

“Well, I don’t, and I would’ve remembered if I suddenly went to bed that way. Later, I found my clothes on the bathroom floor, and there was water on the tiles like I took a shower in the middle of the night.” Scratching my head at the memory, I carry on. “I woke up one day wearing crazy stuff that I had worn in my dream.”

“Like what?”

“I had on an entire jogging outfit, including shoes.” I leave out the whole Tarzan theme of the dream. Jake doesn’t need to know I’ve been picturing Dr. Nicholas Barnes wearing a loincloth. “Once, I woke up after dreaming I’d been at a strip club as the headliner, wearing the boots and thong I had on in the dream. I didn’t know I owned those, Jake.”

I watch as Jake’s eyebrows quickly jump up to meet his forehead. “Hell, Kat. Did this just happen?”

“No. I’d already spoken with my counselor about it. He was concerned it was either related to the use of the sleep aid or combining it with alcohol, so I decided to quit both to see if the situation resolved itself. But…”

“But what?” Jake asks guardedly.

“Well, I had a date the other night, and I don’t remember much of what happened. It has freaked me out.” I wrap my arms around myself and refuse to make eye contact with him now.

“What happened?”

“Mark had been asking me out. I’m not at all attracted to him, but after we were both decompressing about the delivery of Katrina’s baby, I agreed to go before I realized what I was doing. Anyway, he came to the house and picked me up, we went to dinner, and I think we went out afterward for a drink…” I stop again, dumbfounded that my memories come to a complete halt at this point. “Beyond that, I can’t remember a thing. I woke up the next day in my bra and underwear, and I don’t recall anything after getting to the bar.”

“Holy shit, Kat. Do you think Mark did something to you?” He sits up taller now.

“I don’t think so. I mean, it’s Mark. Not some stranger. Plus, there wasn’t a scratch on me.” I get up from where I’m sitting next to him on the couch, feeling the need to pace as I continue. “I swear I don’t think I took anything. I don’t remember how the evening ended, but I hid the pills because I wanted to see if the weird clothing changes would stop if I wasn’t taking them anymore. I didn’t have much to drink at all. I just can’t figure out where a large block of time went.” Again, with the damn tears.

“Kat. Is there a chance Mark could have slipped something in your drink?” Jake asks, distressed.

“But why? We’re friends. I had my underwear on when I woke up. What did he do? Rape me, put my underwear back on, but thought, oh, I’ll leave her clothes on the floor? Plus, this weird shit was happening before the date. I can’t just blame this on him.” Full-blown hysterics have taken over now. “I ordered a damn Nanny cam to spy on myself at night, so I can figure out what the hell I’m doing,” I choke out, my face covered in tears.

Standing to grab me in a tight hug, I feel his arms around me like bands of steel. “We’re going to figure this out, Kat. Shhh.” Kissing my head, he pulls back. “I do think you should get tested, just to be on the safe side. You don’t have to go anywhere. I think you can get a Rohypnol test online where they use your hair follicles or something. Just don’t wait too long. It’s worth it to get some answers.”

“This is crazy, Jake,” I sputter.

“I know. But you need to sort everything out. Once you can scratch the Rohypnol off the list of possibilities, you can move on. Maybe come up with other things that could’ve caused the way you’ve been behaving. I’m glad you’re holding off on the zolpidem for a while. At least until you can get this figured out better. Probably not sleeping at all now, huh?”

“Nope.”

“Well, if it makes you feel any better, I’ve had some weird shit happen when I was taking zolpidem. So, it might not be you.” He laughs. I could tell he was trying to lighten the mood.

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