Page 55 of Fractured

“Hey, Kat. When did you get here?” I watch as Jake strolls into the kitchen, inspecting the various food items on display. “Melanie put you straight to work, huh?” Jake gives me a one-armed hug, grabbing a small mozzarella ball off of the end of one of the skewers.

“Well, I needed help from someone who didn’t assign himself as taste tester and then disappear whenever I need something.” Melanie rebuffs.

“I’m trying to entertain our guests. Kat, can I carry those trays out for you?” Jake asks, stealing a pesto chicken appetizer off of the silver platter as he’s offering. Melanie catches him in the act and swats him with a dishtowel.

“Yeah, so long as they all make it to the table.” I laugh. I carry the larger platter with the mozzarella skewers, and he carries the two smaller silver serving trays.

“Kat, you want to grab a drink and head to the study to talk while Mel’s busy? It might be easier to do it now than later when there are even more people… well, and more alcohol on board.”

Looking back toward the kitchen, I wince, worrying about the trouble we might both be in if we stray from Mel’s to-do list for very long.

“She’ll be okay,” Jake reassures, grabbing my arm. “Hey Nate, can you give Mel a hand in the kitchen? I’m stealing Kat for a minute, and I don’t want her to think we both ran out on her.”

“Sure, Jake.” Nate hesitates briefly, taking some bruschetta off of the tray before walking toward the kitchen.

We enter Jake’s study, and I try to take a calming breath. The room is beautiful. It’s appointed in deep mahogany and red velvet furnishings. The back wall is floor-to-ceiling bookshelves with a formal mahogany desk placed anteriorly. There’s a beautiful cloisonné world globe on a stand near the large picture window that opens out onto their backyard. Deep red velvet chairs are seated in front of the desk. “Sit, Kat. What’s going on?”

“Okay. So, if I sound a little wound up, know I’m not upset with you. It’s the situation. I just need to get some clarity on all of this.” I notice Jake has a harried expression on his face now. “Nick came to me recently and shared some startling news.”

“Jesus, Kat. I honestly thought he was a good guy. I never would’ve-”

“No. No. Nothing like that. Let me finish. I know you two have talked a bit about me. I’m not upset. But, because of the conversations the two of you have had and the interactions he’s had with me… well, he was able to put some things together I might not have discovered otherwise.”

“What’re you saying, Kat?”

“It’s the sleeping pill. I’d determined my weird dreams and waking up in crazy outfits was somehow related to the pill before Nick came to me, but he confirmed it. The scary part… It appears I’ve been doing things outside of my home on the stuff and have no memory of it.” I look up at him momentarily, trying to gather my strength to continue.

“Like what?”

“Well, I don’t want to go into too much detail. I’m humiliated enough by all of this. But Nick saw me out one night, and I have no recollection of it. Like, at all. I have some vague pictures in my head of a dream I had that matches some of what he’s told me…”

“Fuck, Kat.” Jake looks pale as he runs his hand through his short brown hair.

“Nick told me you’d experienced some weird stuff using it too. That’s how he put all of this together. I haven’t used those pills since before my date with Mark. But I know you take them all the time. Have you had anything happen? Things you couldn’t remember doing?”

“Kat. I feel terrible about this. I was trying to help you get some sleep when I encouraged you to take those pills. I had no idea all of this would happen. I’ve had people say they’ve seen me out places when I didn’t recall the event they were describing. But I chalked that up to drinking. I figured I was plastered, or the combination of alcohol and the pills caused me to be more out of it. Honestly, other than Melanie telling me that I’m all ramped up in bed on zolpidem, I haven’t had anything else happen that made me wonder if I’d done something.”

We both sit for a few moments, absorbing all of this information. “Jake, I’m not taking that stuff anymore. I’d have to be either desperate for sleep or too far gone to care what happened to me to take them again.” I stop to try and gather my words. “I’m not telling you what to do or how to live your life, but be careful if you choose to keep using them. I wanted to make sure you knew what I’d figured out, so you didn’t find out the hard way if the pills were having a similar effect on you.”

“Thanks, Kat. And again, I’m really sorry. I was only trying to help. You know I’d never do anything to hurt you.”

“I know that, Jake. You’re more like family than my blood relatives. I trust you and Mel with my life. The only reason I wanted to speak with you alone was so she didn’t become overly concerned about you. I don’t want to be the cause of anyone else’s trouble.” Looking down at my hands, I wring them as I think about my personal experience. “I’m afraid to think of what I could’ve done. If I was out driving around on the stuff and had hurt someone.”

“Kat. Don’t think about that. Now that you know, it’s time to start putting that stuff behind you. There’s no sense wasting any more energy considering the could have’s.” He looks at me with complete sincerity, and I nod in agreement.

Jake leans forward now, prompting me to do the same. “What I do know is if we don’t get back out there, Melanie’s going to kill me.”

* * *

There are about twenty-five people sitting around multiple tables in the dining room, den, and front hallway. We’re passing enough food around to feed an army between each of said tables and laughing at memories of various squad, fire, and police calls. Melanie’s prepared traditional Thanksgiving fare and some atypical side dishes. The libations are flowing, and it feels good to be surrounded by raucous merriment. I’m sitting across from Tate and Tanner Manning. I’ve known them for years, and I still have a tough time telling them apart. One has a small mole just beneath his right lower lid. I have to look closely to spot it, but it’s the tell I need.

“So, no dates tonight?” I ask, knowing they both had girls on their arms last year.

“Nah, flying solo tonight,” Tanner says.

“We’ve had a lot of family drama lately. Our little brother’s gotten himself into a bit of a situation with a girl. Stuff like that happens, and you realize spending time with people can get real serious, real quick. Whether you want it to or not.” I notice Tate shares this intel in spite of Tanner’s apprehensive expression. I’m picking up definite vibes from Tanner. This is a more personal matter than he wants to discuss in this setting. Despite my curiosity, I don’t push for more details.

“How’s Eve? I feel like I never really get to talk to her. We’re always working opposite shifts in the ER.” Tate and Tanner’s sister is sweet and beautiful. I can only imagine how she’s managed to date with these two playing interference.

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