Page 81 of Fractured

Watching this footage, I cover my mouth with my hand. I’m stunned. Not only by the events of the evening but the great care he took of me. It isn’t adding up. Why was he here? Why did he have to carry me in? Why was I wet? I watch carefully as he comes to the door of the bathroom and just, what? Stares?

Completely intrigued by this, I watch as he slowly comes to the bedside and slinks down to his knees, kissing my face. After he dries my hair, I watch as he leaves the view of the camera and returns in his boxer briefs, and joins me.

Fresh tears start to tumble down my face at his reverence. I watch as he strokes my hair and holds me. At one point, he gathers me into his lap and rocks me. This seems to go on for a while, so I decide to stop watching. My head is in a daze. How could I not remember anything that happened? Had I let him in? How had we both gotten so wet?

I head back to the bathroom to perform my usual morning routine and slide on my robe. I definitely need coffee. As I approach the coffee pot to fill it with water, I find a note.

It’s all ready to go, kitten. Just push the on button. Kinda like you do to me.There’s an actual smiley face drawn on the note. Nick Barnes drew me a smiley face.

I hit the button and turn and notice there is another note propped against the flowers he’d sent to the hospital.

Kat,

I’m not sure if you recall last night. I promise to fill in the blanks when I see you. You must’ve taken a sleeping pill. I came to see you, and you weren’t here. I found you safe, but you were soaked by the rain. I need you to promise you won’t take those pills again. I couldn’t bear it if I lost you. I’m on call this morning. I didn’t want to leave. I’ll see you soon.

We’ve got this, Kat

Nick

xo

Chapter Twenty-Seven

Kat

Returning to my room, I carry Nick’s sweet note and place it on my bedside table. I pick up my phone, realize the battery’s dead, and plug it into the charger. In contrast, I feel more energized than I’ve been in days. It’s amazing how a little sleep can help. As the thought crosses my mind, I ponder how I’ll be able to continue finding respite without the sleeping pills. Nick’s right. I can’t continue to use the little white pills. They’re far too dangerous. Beyond the chance of committing any further misdeeds, not to mention those acts potentially being discovered by others, I could’ve hurt someone. I was desperate. It’s my only excuse. But I have to find some other way.

Looking down, I observe my phone has come back to life, and it’s still open to my music app. “Breathe Me” by Sia is cued. Removing the headphones, I hit play. As the haunting melody begins, I take in the opening line of the song. ‘Help, I have done it again.’More and more, my life seems to imitate art. And not in a good way.

I lie back down onto my pillow, rolling away from the light of the world outside. As I do, I can smell Nick’s manly scent on the linens next to me. I still cannot tell if it’s his cologne, aftershave, body wash, or just him. There’s a musky undercoat, topped with a layer of lust. I clutch it to me and remember the image of him on my Nanny cam, caring for me in my altered state. So many unanswered questions. How is it fair to chain a man like this to a wreck like me? I jerk at the sensation of the phone buzzing, interrupting Sia’s evocative melody.

“Hello?”

“Hi, baby. It’s me. I needed to check on you.”

“I’m good.”

“You sure?”

“I don’t know, Nick. I’m just overwhelmed by whatever took place last night. I’m sorry I took that pill. I was desperate. I hadn’t slept in so long.”

“I know, kitten. But we’re going to come up with another way. I’m throwing those things out today.”

“No. You’re right. Wait, what do you mean you’re throwing them out?”

“Open the door, Kat.”

Startled, I jump up and look down at myself. I’m wearing an oversized shirt I use on dirty chore days, boy shorts, and a robe. I certainly don’t have any makeup on, and my hair is a fright.

“Kat. Please open the door. You aren’t shutting me out anymore.”

“But I look-”

“Beautiful, Kat. You always look beautiful. I found you in your pajamas last night, and you never looked lovelier.” I hear a chuckle on the line, and this breaks my hysteria.

“Yeah, I’ll bet. A drugged-out fanatic in flannel. Okay. I’ll be right there.” Walking toward the front door, I take a quick detour into the bathroom to clean up a little. I only take a minute as I know it’s freezing outside, butgood god, I’m a freaking mess.

Swinging the door open, I greet my gallant knight. I can’t control the smile that takes over my face as I take him in. He’s clad in charcoal suit pants, a white button-down shirt and light grey tie, a dark grey wool overcoat, and carrying the largest bouquet of roses I’ve ever seen.

---