Page 56 of Deprived No More

“Fuck, fuck,” he chants above me as he slams into me several more times and then stills. A few minutes pass like this before he slowly rocks his shaft in and out of me as if he’s savoring this moment.

I get it. I don’t want this to end.

As he slowly withdraws, he whispers, “Go.”

“What?”

Suddenly, there’s a clap in the distance.What was that?

“Go,” he pants.

Was that thunder? Or is this part of the charade?

Feeling his hand on my backside, pushing me away, I deduce this must be what happened that night. I just left. I bend down to squeeze out of the small crevice between him and the tree and adjust my clothing before heading inside. I have to remove my shoes, as my limbs are shaking too much to tolerate traversing this incline back to the house with my stilettos on. Finally making it back to the house, I collapse on the couch and try to collect myself.

The weight of what he’s done for me is suddenly more than I can bear. The shaking I once felt was from my incredible adventure with him is now an earthquake of nerves and emotions, all too intense to handle. I drop my head in my hands and begin to weep, completely overcome.

“Kat?”

CHAPTERTWENTY-ONE

Nick

“Kat?”

Fuck. What have I done?

Rushing to her side, I pull her into my arms. “Baby. I’m sorry. I was just trying to-”

“No-” She’s trying to push me away. I have to make her understand.

“Shhh,” I try to soothe her. “I’m so, so sorry. I wanted to give you an idea of what that night meant to me.” I rock her in my arms, wanting to kick myself for what I’ve done. I should’ve talked to her about this first.

“Thank you,” she whispers against my neck.

Pulling back, I look at her. She’s still shaking. “What?”

“Thank you.”

“You’re okay?”

“I’m more than okay.” The relief that washes over me is intense. Hell, I might cry with her.Thank fuck.

“I needed you to understand the birthday present you gave me all those years ago was the most incredible night of my life,” I say, pulling her back into me. “I hated that it had only negative memories for you.”

“I can’t remember a lot, but so much of what you did tonight brought back feelings. Like I’d been there before.”

Kissing her on the head, I rock her back and forth, relieved she’s okay.

“I know I’ve avoided talking about that night for all of these years. I’m sorry. There are a lot of missing links from that time when I was taking the sleeping pills. But I can’t believe you went to so much trouble to show me why it was important to you. And I get it now.”

“I’d do it all again. Unlike you, every detail of that night is seared into my brain. I’ve replayed it over and over. I think if there was any doubt how I felt about you, I was completely addicted after that encounter.”

I notice the blush on her face and can’t help but clarify. “I’d never been particularly adventurous before I met you. I was pretty vanilla. I didn’t know anything else, so it didn’t bother me. But from the minute I saw you in that damn parking lot at St. Luke’s, I couldn’t get you out of my head.” I shake my head at the memory. God, I fought it tooth and nail. I can’t help but laugh. “I was so done with women. You were the last thing on my radar. But you did a number on me, and then when I was ready to go all-in, you wanted nothing to do with me.”

“I wouldn’t say that.” She giggles. “I just had a lot going on between not understanding what was happening with the farfetched sleepwalking, my horrible history with men, and then the first guy who tempts me looks like something out of a men’s magazine.”

I can’t help but sit a little taller at this remark. Everything about this woman makes me feel like more of a man. Makes me want to be the kind she deserves.

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