Page 61 of Deprived No More

9:55 p.m.

Unknown number: I know you want me. I can see it in your eyes.

CHAPTERTWENTY-THREE

Kat

Unknown number: I know you want me. I can see it in your eyes.

What. The. Fuck?I read, reread, and reread it again. Am I reading this right? My heart is racing. This has to be a wrong number. I mean, there’s no way this could happen again. Unless? It’s still Mark?

Looking about the space, as if someone is here watching this unfold, I put the phone down and try to concentrate on my work. Not twice, but three times, I backspace over the words on the screen in front of me. I can’t concentrate for shit now. Who am I kidding? There’s no way I’m going to be able to finish these charts tonight like this. I need to get in touch with cardiology to get this patient admitted and head home.

Feeling the need to move, I hop up from my spot and head to the physicians’ work area in search of Marty. Seeing him at his computer, I take a seat beside him. “Hey. I haven’t heard back from the on-call cardiologist. Have you talked to them today?”

“No, actually. Hey, Donovan. Have you talked to cards today?”

“No. But I haven’t been here long.”

“I’d say call them back one more time, and then if you haven’t heard back, I’ll take over the case so you can head home.”

Feeling at least a little relieved, I tell him thanks and head back to try them one more time. As I place a second consult order into the phone app to reach the unassigned cardiologist on call, I can’t help reopening my messaging app to look at the text again. Like it was all just a figment of my imagination.

“Kat,” Donovan says as he comes around the desk to where I’m sitting. “How you holdin’ up?”

“What?” The question catches me off guard. Can he tell I’m flustered about this text?

“I haven’t seen you since the last time we worked together, and I can’t stop thinking about you.”

“Um, wha-”

“Mark. Everything okay after the other day?”

Oh, yeah. God, where’s my head? This stupid message has me completely paranoid. “I’m better now. I didn’t realize how much of that time I hadn’t dealt with until I saw him again. I guess you bury stuff until you’re forced to deal with it sometimes.”

“Yes, that’s probably true. But you know you have people to lean on. You don’t have to handle this alone.”

Suddenly, I wonder if he’s talking about Mark or my latest issue. Or is Mark the latest issue? I drop my head into my hands, feeling completely overwhelmed.

“Kat?”

“Oh, I’m sorry, Donovan. It’s been a really long day, and I think it’s catching up with me. You know me. I usually stay late and get my charts finished before heading home, but I think I might have to return on my day off and do it. If I can ever get cardiology to answer my consult request, I’m heading home. I’m mentally and physically exhausted.” Looking up, he gives me a concerned look and pats me on the back.

“Well, don’t wait too long to pass this off to Marty. Get home to your family and get some rest.”

Driving home, I can’t seem to fight the agitation I’m feeling. It’s beyond unsettling. It seems unfathomable that Mark would do this again. I mean, he’s already lost so much because of the last time he was fixated on me. But then again, maybe he feels he has nothing to lose.

I can’t help opening the app and reading it again.

I know you want me. I can see it in your eyes.

I can see it in your eyes. The way Mark had looked at me the other day from his hospital bed. It was intense. Did he think he saw anything in mine? Besides fear. Guilt perhaps? Could he use that as mental warfare to continue to abuse me in a different way?

Bzzz. Bzzz.

Jumping in my seat at the unexpected incoming call or text, I drop my phone onto the floorboard of the car. Thank God I was parked at a light. Ensuring the light is still red, I reach for the phone, hoping it is cardiology calling back so I can tell them to speak with Marty in the ER, and not another unidentified text. However, as I look at the cell phone’s screen, I realize it’s an incoming call from my friend Olivia and rush to answer before she disconnects.

“Hey. I almost missed you. I’m driving home from the ER.”

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