Page 86 of Hard Hat Hottie

Joyce, Ellie, and Charlene had stuck around to help go through Mom’s things. I’ll be forever grateful, as I just don’t think I could’ve handled it. Despite their efforts, my Magic 8 ball hadn’t turned up. They did locate a few pairs of Harlow’s panties. They were clean and tucked away in Mom’s dresser for safe keeping. She must’ve found them and put them in her hamper.

It’s been a week since everyone left. The quiet is almost deafening. There are times I contemplate getting a dog. Then I remember the chaos of trying to care for someone around my work schedule and realize that’s not possible right now.

Braxton has been really understanding about losing Mom. He’s working around my need to process this fully before I can get back to it. Yet I know I need to push myself to move on. He can’t put plans on hold forever.

My eyes drift down the pink sandy coastline to a young family happily frolicking in the turquoise surf.Hell, I want that.I’d never allowed myself to consider just how much until now. Visions of Harlow, Justin, Alec, and me replace the family down the shoreline. My mind has been contemplating crazy things in all of this silence. Even things that terrify me. That stupid ass song Joyce played has been doing a number on me.

Dance, Harry. Dance.

2:48 p.m.

Harrison

I’m sorry.

Shit. Why did I hit send? I wasn’t done yet.

2:49 p.m.

Harrison

You deserve better.

I stare at the phone, trying to think of what to say. I don’t want to ramble on. Hell, I don’t mind if she thinks I’m begging. I deserve to beg. All I had to do was communicate with her about what I was feeling, like Braxton had said. Talk to her about my limitations. She could’ve decided if she was willing to hang in there. Maybe I didn’t want to hear the answer if she planned to walk away like all of the rest.

Unlike the last text I sent, she responds to this one almost immediately.

3:04 p.m.

Harlow

You’re right. I do.

While her self-assuredness is one of her most alluring qualities, she’s confirmed why I hadn’t tried harder. That gnawing in my chest aches a little more.That really is a no.

It’s your own fault, Harry. You practically pushed her away.

Harlow

“Boys, stop running!”

I’m beyond agitated and them running around the house isn’t helping. Normally, I find their antics energizing. But this isn’t the time.

My brows furrow. I shouldn’t yell at them. None of this is their fault. I’d barely recovered from seeing Harrison sending off his latest paramour before he had the nerve to send an apology text. Had he seen me? It was all I could do not to blow up his phone. But I won’t give him the satisfaction of thinking I’m some crazed, jealous stalker.

As painful as it’s been to learn the truth, at least I can stop pining for him. Wondering about his life and wishing he’d call. And to think I kept making up excuses. His mother needed him. He was busy. Not too busy to bring a woman home.

And there’s no sense wondering if introducing him to my boys was what pushed him away. That was the intent. To put all my cards on the table and wait for his next move. Well, I did.And so did he.Accept it and move on, Harlow.

Ding, dong.

“I’ve got it. Let me get it!” Alec yells as he flies down the steps, Justin hot on his heels.

“Boys, someone’s going to get hurt if you keep running up and down the stairs like that!” It’s official. My nerves are shot. I’m not sure I can handle much more.

“Dad!”

For real?