Page 474 of Filthy Elites

I’m a prisoner in my own life and no matter how loud I shout or how honest I am, he’s stolen my voice. Day by day it feels like I’m becoming more and more brittle, that constantly being forced to bend to his will is slowly snapping me in two. Winter break and Christmas with my dad is the only bright spot on my horizon. Mom lost her shit when I told her I planned to go to Maine for the holidays, telling me I was selfish and childish and mean for leaving her alone at Christmas. Miranda swooped in and saved the day when she invited my mom to have Christmas at their house with Clay, Evan and Hunter’s families too.

Sebastian was beyond pissed when he found out I was going to visit with my dad, he even tried to invite himself on the trip, but my dad shot him down. He said that as much as he’d love to meet my boyfriend, this was our first Christmas together in fourteen years and he wanted it to just be the two of us.

Because winter break isn’t that long, Dad convinced my mom to allow me to miss the last week of school so I could spend more time with him. Today is my last day of suffering, then tomorrow it’s sayonara Green Acres and hello two weeks of blissful Sebastian-free time.

“Are you all packed?” Mom asks, her lips pressed into a flat line as she leans against the doorframe in my room.

“Yep,” I say, nodding my head in the direction of my case leaning against my closet door.

“Have you got your thermals, it’s probably going to be snowing and below zero, you’ll freeze.”

“I’m looking forward to seeing the snow. I have plenty of layers and Dad said he’s taking me to get a winter jacket and anything else I need when I get there.”

“You know you could have just gone to Vail with Sebastian if you wanted to see the snow, the Lockwoods offered to have the holidays in the mountains if that’s what you wanted.”

“That was very kind of them,” I say through gritted teeth. “But I’m not going to Maine for the snow, I’m going to spend time with Dad.”

Mom rolls her eyes in a way I never saw her do before she started spending time with Sebastian’s mom and her friends. “Why would you want to spend the holidays with your father in his tiny apartment, when you could be in the Lockwoods’ beautiful home? Did you see how gorgeous their Christmas tree is? I swear it’s got to be at least fifteen feet tall, it’s just stunning. Sebastian is absolutely heartbroken that you won’t be spending the holidays together, Miranda told me he’d planned to use their jet to come and surprise you on Christmas, until your father refused.”

Closing my eyes and stretching my neck from one side to the other, I hold in the words that are dying to fall from my lips, but I know there’s no point. Mom won’t tolerate me saying anything bad about Sebastian or any of his family or friends. She’s completely brainwashed, to the point that when Miranda suggested I only apply to the college Sebastian is attending next year, my mom nodded and agreed.

“Their tree is beautiful, Mom, but I already explained that I’m looking forward to spending some quality time with Dad. When I visit in the summer he has to work, but he’s on vacation during the holidays and it’ll give us some real time together.”

The front door opens and my mom literally leaps with excitement, preening slightly as she smooths down her now permanently straight hair and locks a wide smile on her face. “That’ll be Sebastian here to pick you up for your date,” she singsongs.

“Hey, little bird, hey Cassidy,” Sebastian croons, giving my mom a hug as he passes her on his way into my room. Yep, you heard right, he just walks straight into our house now without knocking, because according to my mom, our casa is his casa and he can just treat this place like a home away from home. “You ready, baby? I made reservations for seven.”

“Oh my goodness, I’ve made you late. Starling, you should have said something. I’m sorry, Sebastian, I was just trying to convince her that we should accept your mom and dad’s kind offer to have the holidays in Vail, instead of her running off to Maine and leaving me all alone,” Mom says, winking at Sebastian.

“I think that’s a great idea, we could go shopping for ski stuff after dinner if you want?” Sebastian smiles.

“That’s okay, I won’t need ski equipment in Maine where I’m spending Christmas.”

His scowl is glacial, but even though I’ve stopped trying to prevent him from asserting his will on every other aspect of my life, there’s no way I’m giving up the opportunity to get away from him for two weeks. Mom pouts, yes, pouts her annoyance and then waves to Sebastian and leaves.

“This is our first Christmas together; I want you to be here with me. You and your mom can stay at my place and we can wake up together on Christmas morning,” he coaxes.

“No, this is the first time my dad has ever asked me to spend Christmas with him.”

“Then I’ll come too,” he says from behind gritted teeth.

“He has a two-bedroom apartment, there’s no room for you to come.”

“We can stay in a hotel, and you can spend your days with him and your nights with me.”

“My dad would not be okay with me staying in a hotel with you, Sebastian. Plus he lives in a really small town, and the only hotel closes for the holidays. You know this, because you suggested it yesterday and the day before that.” I’ve never been more grateful that my dad lives in the smallest, ugliest place in Maine, because I’m sure Sebastian would have followed me regardless of me telling him not to, if there was a decent hotel for him to stay in. Luckily my stalker isn’t down for spending Christmas alone in a roadside motel, which is the only place still open within thirty miles of my dad’s house.

“You’re not going,” he snaps, his voice laced with steel and unwavering determination.

“Yes I am.”

“No, you’re not. I fucking forbid it, Starling, you aren’t going to fucking Maine.”

“You can’t forbid me from going to see my dad,” I say as calmly as I can muster, my voice only cracking slightly as nerves pool low in my stomach.

“I’ll convince your mom to make you stay, she’s on the verge of doing it anyway.”

“My dad has joint custody of me, my mom can’t stop him from seeing me and neither can you. Why are you doing this?”

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