Maybe she was romanticizing all of this. Maybe the forest didn’t care if she was there, and it certainly didn’t care if she found her elf. But in her mind, it felt as though the very trees themselves were guiding her to Rowan’s side.
She had almost reached the edge of a clearing when she heard a stick snap. Tanis dropped into a low crouch, her eyes narrowed in the direction of the sound.
Her heart thundered in her chest. Of course, it could be an animal. It could be Rowan. But the moment she heard the sound, she imagined herself pressed against a crystal with her hands over her belly, cowering before a mortal man she should have been able to kill. A man who had intended to hurt her and her children and she’d done nothing at all to keep herself safe.
Partially down the meadow, she saw a bow and arrow stick out of the leaves. They were rough hewn and made with a heavy hand, but she knew that the arrow would fly. It was not directed at her, rather at something in the meadow beyond.
Rowan.
The tension in her chest eased, but it didn’t disappear. She missed the times when she didn’t feel fear the moment something new or unexpected happened in front of her. But those times were gone, and there was only so much she could do to bring them back. Perhaps they never would.
Her eyes followed the line of the arrow and then she saw the small doe that stood at the edge of the field. Big eyes blinked up at the sun, and Tanis thought perhaps her elf had positioned himself so that the sun would blind the deer if she looked in his direction. It was an intelligent ploy to hunt.
Rowan stepped out of the woods. Every movement was so carefully made, calm, and collected. He seemed to even be controlling his breath, which she found rather amusing.
She watched him hunt with pride. He focused on his prey, just as a dragon might have. With absolute focus, as though the rest of the world didn’t exist around him other than his breath and the heart of the doe.
He drew his arm back and then she heard the creak of his bow. The sound made her wonder if he’d oiled it before coming out here to hunt, and that would be his downfall. The doe heard the same sound that Tanis did.
She watched with amusement as the arrow flew from his bow, but the deer raced away long before it hit its target. His arrow hit the ground, dirt spraying up from the impact, but his prey had already disappeared.
It would be impossible to track a beast that fast through the woods. Even if he sprinted after it, the doe would disappear into the dappled light of the forest.
He cursed, the sound echoing through the meadow and scaring off any other animals that might have lingered nearby. That sound would make them race away from him, disappearing into their homes in the undergrowth.
Tanis emerged from her hiding spot, not even trying to hide her laughter. “Are those the exceptional hunting skills of the elves? I thought you were all natural born hunters. Aster did better than that.”
Though her words must have stung, he grinned at her and braced himself on the bow. “You only saw one hunt, dragon. Surely you don’t think you can judge my skills off one missed deer?”
In fact, she very much thought she could judge him for that. The mistake was a simple one, and he should have known better. If they were starving, then his mistake would have cost them their lives. But he didn’t need to hear those words when he was smiling at her like that.
The sun framed his body with a golden glow that made her heart race. And the smile on his face was so freely given, as though it never crossed his mind what a gift it was to see that expression.
Maybe he didn’t have thoughts like that about her, but the longer she was by his side, the more she felt honored that she’d gotten even a few moments with him. He was so strange. So unusual compared to the men she was used to.
Dragons were rough and crude sometimes. Others, like Attor, looked at life as a chore to make sure that everything went the way they wanted. She’d thought everyone was like that. Every detail of every day regimented down to the last second.
“Do you never worry about work?” she asked, meandering into the meadow. “Every time I see you, your heart seems so... so...”
“Free?” He lifted a brow and waited for her response.
Tanis took her time. She knew he wouldn’t rush her as she mulled the word over in her mind.
Was he free? He certainly acted like it. She would hazard a guess that Rowan had never felt obligated to do anything in his life. And yet, here she was in comparison. She was obligated to look over the crystals. Forced to have her own clutch. Guilted into serving her people with no life of her own. Had any choice been her own?
She tilted her head to the side and nodded. “Free. Yes, I supposed that’s the correct word.”
“I don’t worry about what other people think. That’s the key to happiness, Tanis.” He winked at her and a sizzle of lightning trailed down her spine. “You seem rather concerned with a lot of people’s opinions about you.”
Why did she suddenly feel so hot? It felt like her shirt was sticking to her skin, but she knew it wasn’t. The sun wasn’t even that strong today, and there was a cool breeze. But he looked at her with heat in his eyes and she wondered if he’d cast some kind of spell on her.
“I worry about what one person thinks of me,” she breathed, and it felt so good to admit that. “I worry that he thinks I’m a foolish woman who has bitten off more than she can chew. I worry that he waits for the right moment to flee back to his homeland because all I can offer him is a life in the woods with no safety or home.”
His expression darkened, but he said nothing. So she continued on, assuming that he knew who she spoke of.
“I worry sometimes in the night that he can never accept me the way I am. That being a dragon is too different, and that someday there will come another person who is more akin to who he is. Someone who could satisfy his needs better than I ever could.” She tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear and waited for him to say something. Anything.
He just stared at her. His chest rising and falling in rapid breaths and his knuckles were white around the bow.