Page 89 of Kingdoms of Night

This—this was what came of being around people. He hurt them, they got hurt, and he started to care, and things only got worse from there. It was lucky enough that her hurt didn’t mean severed limbs or a dead body. She’d stayed far enough away by the cavern and he’d managed to suppress his wolf, but how long would that last? When she’d moved, he’d breathed her in, imagined her taste, and it had to be how a predator looked at prey. It unnerved him. It disgusted him. It terrified him.

How long until the next hurt was a broken bone, a maimed arm, or worse? He’d killed before, and that had been as a human, just on instinct. What he was capable of as a monster was anyone’s guess, and it was a gamble he wouldn’t take with Annette’s life, Anouk’s, or even a stranger’s.

He didn’t know when the moon would be full in this place, but the fullness swelled in his blood, little by little, and when the time came, not only would his wolf take over, but neither he nor Idalno would be able to run away from each other. In his worst nightmare, and probably hers, he’d chase her down and shred her into ribbons. And because of Puck’s selfish mischief, she wouldn’t even stand a chance at getting away. She didn’t want to die, and he didn’t want to kill her either, or live with having done so.

No, it was best they keep moving and find the girls as soon as possible, before the full moon. It was best for everyone involved. And as much as he understood the need for space, he’d do or say whatever he had to if it kept her going.

Determined, he followed after her, and she shot him a venomous glare. He almost flinched. Pausing, he let her get ahead by a few paces.

Following her doesn’t seem to be making her happy,Hawthorn observed.

It’s because he hasn’t asked her if she wants to run with him.Buttercup nudged his leg with her head as they kept moving along.It takes more than just saying you’re sorry.

Probably something more akin to walking on nails or setting himself on fire. Maybe a run after all, just right off a cliff. He scrubbed a hand over his face, groaning into his palm. He couldn’t just leave her alone. He really couldn’t.

* * *

IDALNO

Idalno found a large black canteen in the large bag of supplies. When she glanced back, she saw that the wolves had followed her. He’d stayed behind. Thank goodness.

“Tea is not worthless, and I am not just a tea maker,” she said to the wolves. “I am an Acolyte of Venom and Poison, and I would have been a master if not for everything being so unfair. I have the knowledge! I have the skill. And I work very hard. But it isn’t about that, is it? Stupid men and their ideas. They always think they know everything. They just know what’s best for everyone, don’t they? And they’re the ones that everyone asks to fix things, even though in the end it will be the women who fix it.”

She pulled up the cattails and laid the reeds on the shore. Then, taking her knife, she began stripping away the roots. “I’m not an idiot. No matter what some may think. And I’m not thin skulled. I’m not weak either. I don’t take care of others because it’s the only thing I can do or because I can’t figure out something better to do with my life. I do it because it needs to be done. And it is as simple as that!”

She proceeded to summon up the other plants that she needed.

Now that she intended them, it was easy to call up the chamomile, needlefoil, doe slipper, and other healing plants and herbs. They barely required anything. The energy simply pulsed in her palm and fingertips and sent up shoots immediately. Here the earth was generous, and she was thankful. Despite her anger.

It took scarcely any of her focus or energy. The sweet and bright scented leaves were free of blight and fully mature within minutes. These plants hadn’t resisted her at all. They barely cost her any energy either. Good thing too, as her arms and hands still ached. It was as if the world had simply given them to her.

She continued ranting to the wolves, her gaze darting occasionally to the hilltop and her voice low as she prepared the herbs for the tea. Stupid blood beetle was probably holding his stomach and just being a big stupid shifter.

“Why are they always like this? Does having the ability to change shapes make it easier for them to just be big jerks to people? Just because you can turn into something other than a human doesn’t mean you’re better than other people. And if you need help, you should take it instead of being stupid. Why is everything so stupid? I hate life.”

They looked at her with such solemn dark-gray eyes. It was as if they understood what she said. Too bad they couldn’t talk some sense into Feron. “I don’t know why you’re sticking with us like this,” she said, twisting the lid off the canteen. “You both deserve far better than being on some insane quest with an Unato and a wolf shifter. You’re not the total failure of a woman, and you don’t have to figure out the whole meaning to your life and your overall purpose and place in the world while searching for your cousin with a—a—”

She sniffed as the tears started to roll down her cheeks.

“I am good at making tea. I always have been. But that doesn’t mean that’s all I’m good for.”

Everyone had always tried to make her join the tea houses. Said she had a gift in passing. Maybe so, but it didn’t line up with what she loved. With what she cared about most.

“Not that anyone cares what I want. It’s about destiny. And not all of us have the destinies we want or even find fulfilling. They only wanted me to go there because there were too many of us. Not everyone could be special. But I wasn’t going to let that happen to me. I know I am. And if they had given me a chance, I would have been the best Master of Venom and Poison who ever existed and ascended into all the other forms.” At least better than Selnon.

She clenched her jaw as she removed some bark from the nearest tree. Though she took care to cut it in a segment that would not do the tree harm, she pressed her hand to the trunk anyway. It looked like a holm oak.

Whispering the words, she let the energy flow through her. The bark healed over, the new growth a little lighter and perhaps thinner than the original craggy bark. “Thank you.”

She crossed back to the wolves and cut the bark in half. “It’s not perfect, but this will make it easier for you to drink.”

The teapot’s exterior had transformed into a stunning depiction of buttercups and periwinkles that curled all around the broad exterior.

“Well,” she said. “Puck wasn’t lying about this or about the existence of the Lambton Wyrm. Maybe he isn’t that bad. Except for the fact that he kidnapped my cousin. I know he says he had nothing to do with it, but I can’t shake the feeling he does.”

She poured the tea out into the bark bowls. It was the perfect temperature as well.

“Well, this is useful.” She clicked her teeth as she contemplated what had happened. “But I’d give up a thousand teapots to have Lalko home safe and sound. They won’t notice I’m gone until tomorrow or maybe for another week, but they’ll know she’s missing in maybe an hour or so. If they don’t know already.”

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