Page 5 of The Masks We Burn

“Not only do you have that going on, but now with this fighting opportunity, it makes sense to be closer. Plus, you go to Whitman, which is only thirty minutes away from Solace.”

Solace is a private university in Emerald Falls, Washington, where my friends attend. It’s a place I thought about going to, but with no actual major in mind, I didn’t want to waste my parent’s money.

“So, what are you saying, Bardot?”

He shrugs. “I have an extra room at the Square. It’s yours if you want it.”

My pulse increases, and a bittersweet hope expands in my chest, but I force it down. “Seriously?”

“Don’t make it weird, Cassidy.” He rewraps his wrist, and I huff out laughter.

As long as I’ve known him, he’s been reserved, and everything he does is with purpose. The thought crosses my mind if he may have some other ulterior motives, but even if he does, I can’t find it in me to care.

“Hell yeah.” I shake his taped hand, and dodge a shift jab he tries to sneak from his left fist.

“Alright. Now, let’s go a little longer, and then I’ll have to split. I have anotheremergencymeeting.” Blaze shakes his head, and he gets in stance, those damn two-colored eyes shining a little too suspiciously.

I grin, stretching my arms across my chest. “Whatever you say, boss man.”

A little longer turns into five minutes, where I somehow get the bastard on his back. My nerves sing throughout my body, lifting me to a high that makes my head feel dizzy. This is the euphoric freedom I search for every day, and it’s yet another way I’m reminded that I’m not ready to settle for what my parents want. What Ishouldwant.

I pick him up, and after a good jab in my ribs, we part ways, with me agreeing to move in this weekend and swearing to let him know about the number he passed on. It’s giving realFight Club-type vibes, and I’m fucking down for it.

Before leaving, I decide to stop by the gym’s smoothie spot and grab a little something for the long ride back to Idaho. I don’t even make it to my car before my phone buzzes.

MOM

It’s like the woman has a telepathic radar.

“Hey, Ma.”

Her soothing voice flows from the speaker. “Hey, honey. How was the fight with Blaze?”

“Great, actually. I got three inches on the guy, and today was the first day I knocked him down.” Unlocking my truck, I throw my duffel bag in the back and hurry to turn on my heated seats.

I’m much bigger and burlier than Blaze, but that shit doesn’t matter when you can’t catch him. Not to mention he’s got almost twenty years more experience on me.

My mom’s voice connects with the Bluetooth and fills my cabin. “Good job, honey. Your dad and I have been lazy today, just hanging around.”

“And you’re goin’ crazy.” Not a question, but an observation. The woman can’t sit still to save her life.

She laughs, the sweet sound softening my heart. “You know it. But during lunch just now, I had this weird feeling take over. A sad one, but happy at the same time. Bittersweet, if you will. Know anything about it?”

I sigh, leaning against the headrest. You know how they say twins have a special connection and can sense one another? Well, that’s my mom and me. Every time something happened at school, good or bad, she already felt it before I even got in the car when she picked me up. An empath, I think, is what people may call her. She’s big on auras and knowing whether she can trust a person or if they’re a snake in the grass. My mom also knows I’ve been distant. Missing something that she couldn’t fix. And that never sat right with her. But I can’t find it in me to admit I’m not ready to be the man she raised me to be.

I’m not ready for her to be disappointed in her only child. The one she’s done everything and anything for.

I’m not ready to break her heart.

“Honey, I’m not gonna push you. But know you can tell me anything.” Her voice is soft, but the way it tilts at the end makes it feel like a plea.

Dammit.

“Blaze offered me his spare room at Solace Square so I could be closer to campus for my last year. Plus, with Spencer getting married and all the things I have to do out here, I thought maybe it might be a good idea.” I’m not sure why but I hold my breath. If my people are anything, they’re supportive. I know they won’t mind me staying out here for my last semester, but she’s a worrier. Too much has happened, and I understand her, I do, but at the same time, it’s long overdue.

But then I can almost feel my mother smile on the other side of the phone. “I think it’s a wonderful idea.”

Knowing what she would say and hearing it are two different things. It makes my heart full and heavy at the same time, but there’s an undercurrent of that same high from feeling alive that makes me realize this is the right thing for me. For now.