Page 44 of Queen of Madness

Maddy nods. “Yep. And Boss may not admit it, but she feels safer after what happened. You may think it did the opposite, but it was already something we were concerned about. You did us a favor.”

I stand, knowing if I continue to sit, I’ll let what little conscience I’m allowed to have seep through. “Glad I could help. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow. Such a lovely place to be. Lovely indeed.”

Four more drops, just four more.

I’m tired today. We’ve been so busy. Every day it seems as if I get two or three more places to go, people to meet, deliveries to make. I’m not complaining, not at all, but my legs are tired today. Yes, they are.

Oh. The ice cream shop. The one with the white and black canopy and the shiny red door. They make everything by hand and it’s so good. Maddy took me there one time. I must ask her to come again.

When we were here, it was dark. The sun had just set, and I dropped some mint chocolate chips on my shirt. There was a dry cleaner a block up that she said would be a good place.

That’s when I saw the prettiest eyes I’d ever seen. The girl, by the corner store, staring up at the stars. It was like looking at green jewels stuck in mud. I wanted to pluck them from her eyes, clean off the muck, then put them back.

But then a few weeks ago, I saw another with eyes like hers. The bodyguard, Ezekiel. He’s a good guard. Onyx likes him. It will be sad when she kills him. But I understand. She can’t be hurt again.

If she were, I know without another thought, we wouldn’t get her back this time.

No.

She’d be lost forever, and without her, there is no wonderland.

Oh! Look at the time. Four more stops and I’ll be done, and already I’m late.

It’s so sunny out. Like something you’d see in the movies, or a cartoon animation of the sky. It’s the faintest blue, reminding me of Kilo’s eyes, and there isn’t a cloud in sight. The temperature is perfect too—a cool sixty-five degrees with the slightest breeze.

Mom woke up this morning like Snow White. Dancing around the estate, assisting Mr. Russ in the kitchen and singing to the tune of a hummingbird. He helped her pack a huge basket for the impromptu picnic Dad suggested, but the contagious smiles lighting up the kitchen quickly turned sour when I realized the boys weren’t coming.

They were on training assignments, Dad had said. But I knew that was code for they were being brought to their knees by Uncle Antonio as hetrainedthem in torture. They needed to fear nothing—not even the grim reaper himself—if they wanted to work high in the ranks. I should be a part of it too, but Dad says a few more years. And no matter how much I argue, he won’t budge.

We’re currently in the limo on our way to a park across town that overlooks a lake, and I haven’t stopped pouting. I’m not trying to be a brat or have an attitude, but it feels like a double whammy.

They can’t enjoy the day while I’m still being treated like a delicate rose.

“You must want to look like your father after all.” My mother’s tender voice and accompanied pat on my thigh forces me to turn and face her. “It will get stuck in that awful scowl if you keep it like that much longer.”

“Momma. They should be here. What’s one day?” Even though I’m speaking to her, we both know my words are meant for my father, who is gazing out the dark tinted window.

“It’s part of the process, baby. They are going to have to miss some of the good days. But it will make them appreciate and cherish them even more when they have them.” My mother tries to reason with me, but it only frustrates me more.

“But how rare is a day like today? It’s so pretty, Momma.”

I’ll forever have a soft spot in my heart for the boys. They have been through things I would only wish on the people that caused them their pain. It was heartbreaking and painful, and everything I never want to see again until the day I die. And because of that, they deserve days like this more than any of us.

“Life isn’t perfect, Onyx.” He sighs. “It can be the sunniest days that bring us the most darkness. And the ones with the blackest skies that we find happiness. Please understand, the boys agreed to this. They are growing stronger every day, and soon, they will never have to worry about someone hurting them, or you, for the rest of their days.”

I hate it when my father brings logic into my fits. It makes me see not only reason but also makes me feel childish, reminding me why he continually puts off my training. I show him I’m not ready.

I take a deep sigh, resignation unwinding the tight muscles in my neck. “You’re right. I’m sorry, Father.”

“Don’t apologize, baby love. That passion, that fierceness you have to protect them, is what will make you a greatdonnaone day.” He reaches over my mother and tilts my chin up to look at him. “Don’t ever lose your fight. Even duringyourdark days.”

“Especiallyduring those,” Mom adds.

“I promise.”

“That’s my girl.”

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