Page 95 of King of Ruin

The anger bubbles to the surface, frustration and madness careening up my throat and out into the air. The screams that come ring in my ears, singeing my vocal cords. But I don’t stop.

I can’t.

I want to rip up the roots of doubt, my hopelessness, guilt, and pure agony. I want all of it to burn in the fire of my screams and leave me void of anything but I want.

They spill from me one after another, and for the first time in my life, I let it go. I let it all go until I’m free. Until I’m weightless.

It could be seconds or perhaps minutes, but soon, my wails fade into soft gasps. The air is too thin now, the wind too cold. My throat burns and my chest aches, and all I want to do is rest. Sleep.

Perhaps I can lay right here for a moment.

Just for a second.

I unclench my hands from the grass, and move slowly. My eyes flash to the gray stones over my parents’ graves, and I realize I can no longer make out the script on them. Everything is blurry. Spinning.

“Onyx?” I hear Kane, but his voice sounds far, almost as if he’s in a tunnel.

I try to look back at him, but he’s not there. There’s only darkness.

Maybe he wasn’t here at all and it was only a dream.

Though my vision is slowly fading, I feel calm as I reach my hand out and touch my father’s tombstone. It’s then that I feel the warmth at my back. The sweet embrace of a loved one. And then, I hear him.

“It can be the sunniest days that bring us the most darkness. And the ones with the blackest skies that we find happiness.”

I push out a sigh. Yes, it must have been a dream.

* * *

The soft rocking of my body wakes me. I allow my eyes to flutter open slightly, just enough to see Kane’s throat between my fan of lashes.

My lids are so heavy, though, I can’t open them any further.

But he has me.

I feel safe.

* * *

It’s the sound of rushing water that stirs me this time. My eyes are closed, but the bright lights of what I assume is my nearby bathroom penetrate the darkness. Strong hands glide over my skin and I move accordingly, lifting my arms and moving my hips, so he can strip me of my clothes.

The rough calluses on his palms leave goosebumps in their wake, and I shiver.

Kane’s warmth nearly feels like a blanket as he moves closer, rubbing my jaw with his thumb. “I’ve got you. Lay back. I promise to have your sheets cleaned.”

I don’t bother opening my eyes and sink into the mattress, letting him take the rest of my clothes off. When he’s done, he places a soft, cotton towel over me. “I’ll be right back.”

Though no words come out, I must make a disgruntled face because he explains further. “You haven’t eaten in close to forty eight hours, so I’m going to grab you something really quick. I won’t be but a minute.”

Realization hits me when he leaves, taking the comfort of his presence with him. The last time I ate was the morningbeforeour meeting with Phineas. And when I got back home, all I wanted to do was shower and kill Sam.

By now, it’s probably close to three in the morning.

As if on cue my stomach contorts, the pain echoing up my esophagus. Clutching the towel tighter, I turn to my side.

I just need to rest. A few moments longer, and I’ll be alright.

* * *