Page 125 of This Side of Beautiful

I gasped.

Nothing.

Clawed at my neck. My chest locked tight.

No air.

No air.

Black spots bloomed in my vision.

I tried to stand. My knees buckled.

“No, no, no,” I muttered, over and over, hands twitching, grasping for something solid.

But nothing was real. Everything was slipping.

I rocked slightly, fingers twitching, curling into my palms.

“Please, no, no, no,” I whispered frantically, breath shallow, uneven, desperate.

I needed help.

I needed Cedrick.

I needed Janae.

But they were not here.

I was alone.

Tears burned my eyes as I fumbled for my phone, my hands shaking too hard. The room blurred.

My body was not listening.

My head spun.

“Make it stop,” I murmured, barely audible. “Please, I don’t want to be here.”

My lips trembled. The pain was too much. It clawed inside me, sinking its teeth in deep, ripping me apart from the inside.

“I don’t want to feel this anymore,” I muttered again, my voice barely above a breath.

I collapsed onto my side, gasping.

Darkness crept in.

The last thing I felt was my phone slipping from my fingers.

Then…

Nothing.

July 24

The steady beeping of a monitor pulled me from sleep.

No dreams. Just emptiness.

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