Page 120 of Ruin

Robert has been talking shit about him. Telling me he’s not looking for me, or how Declan is the one who gave me back to him. He’s broken me to the point, I can’t even think anymore.

There was a little bit of hope, I thought I could put all of this in the past. But that hope has been set on fire. Now I’m watching Robert take all the fight I had in me and turn it into ashes.

Robert has spent every second of the day hurting me. I fought, fuck did I fight, but walking away with Declan made Robert go crazy. Before he would just hit me, but then say sorry over and over again, but not now. Now he keeps going.

My body hurts from how much he beat me for walking away from him. He’s raped me. Every time he’s touched me, he’s shouted at me that he will take every touch Declan ever gave me and taint it.

Eight times he’s raped me since I’ve been here, and every time he said he can’t wait to put a baby in me. He’s doing what he said he was going to do, to make sure, no matter what, there will be a part of him with me at all times.I’m scared when he finds out I’m on the pill, and that’s why I’m not getting pregnant.

I won’t let a baby be born. If Declan doesn’t find me, I’ll do everything I can to never have his baby, even if I have to hurt myself to do it.

I place my head on the wall and look at my hands cuffed to the radiator. He tells me it is to keep me safe. To keep me fucking safe. He says that now he knows I cut myself, he’s not risking me ending my life. If only I could.

I’m not sure how much more I can take from him. My lip is burning from the cuts, my stomach is more than likely bruised over, and I’m not sure I can go through another attack from him.

“Please find me,”I beg, hoping Declan can hear me.

I jump when the door opens.Please no, not again.“I brought you something to eat.” Robert walks closer to me, with a tray in his hand. “I need you to be fit and healthy.”

He sits on the floor with me, and I look at the soup and bread. He brings the soup to my mouth, but I don’t open it for him, there’s no way I’m eating anything he is giving me.

“Trixie, don’t piss me off.” The sharpness in his tone makes me look up at him. “I don’t want to force the food down on you.” He grabs my face, forcing me to open my mouth. I try to fight him, but he slaps me. “You’re making me do this. I’m giving you everything.” He stands up shouting at me, then kicks my leg hard enough for it to scream in pain.

I close my eyes, hoping he will leave the room, and not rape me again. That would be great. But I hear him sitting on the bed, fuck, he’s not leaving.

“You know when I first saw you, and you showed me that cute smile of yours, it did things to me. I tried to stay away from you, but the more you smiled, the more I wanted you.” I open my eyes and look around the room, there has to be something within reaching distance that I can use to get the handcuffs off me. Something. “One taste of you and I was done. I knew, no matter what, there was never going to be anyone else in the world I wanted. I needed every smile from you. I needed every tear from you. I needed everything from you.” He looks at the bed, and smiles.

“The first time we had sex, it was magic, wasn’t it?” He looks at me, and I feel sick. He honestly thinks what he is doing is right, and he’s not sick in the head.

“It was magic, and I know soon you’ll love me as much as I love you.” He kneels in front of me and leans in to kiss me. I’m too tired to fight him. “I hope you eat.”

He walks out of the room, and I kick the tray, so everything tips over. And again, I try to pull the handcuff free from the radiator, nothing. Leaning my head on the wall again, I see something shine in the corner of my eye.

How did I not see it on the tray? I reach my leg out to get it, but it is a little too far for me, I feel it hit the tip of my toe.Come on, you can do it.I pull on the cuffs on my wrist as much as I can so I can stretch out more. I don’t care if they are ripping my skin, I need to get it.Thank you,I shout to myself as I get my toe on it and pull it closer to me. Please, please let this work.

I pull the fork closer to me and pick it up. There has to be a way I can use this. Trixie think. Only one thing is coming to me, and that is to bend the fork tines so I have one to jam into the handcuff lock, and hope I can open it. I have no idea how to open cuffs, but I’m going to wiggle this all night if I have to. I hope it opens for me.I really do.

Putting the fork into the keyhole, I take a quick glance at the door, hoping Robert will leave me alone for a while.

Come on, open. Please open.I take the fork out, and try a different angle moving it around. Why is this not working? I wipe the tears away, I’m so close but at the same time I’m still so far away from freedom.Please, open.Moving it around a little more, I push the fork in as far into the keyhole as I can, then I hear it. A click.

Fuck, it opens. I fucking opened it. Pulling the cuffs out from behind the radiator, I quickly get up closer to the door. I can hear the TV is on. I move quickly to the window, to open it so that I can climb out.No!I shout to myself.

The crazy asshole has nailed the window shut.

Taking a deep breath in, there is only one way out. I have to run. I look around for my shoes, fuck, they aren’t in the bedroom. My glance moves to the woods through the window. He said this cottage is surrounded by woods. I look down at my bare feet. Shit.It’s the only thing to do.

Carefully opening the door, I take the first step out of the room that has been my jail cell. Robert’s sitting on the couch watching TV with a beer. The front door is straight ahead. I just need to get to the front door, and then I can run and hide. Sooner or later, I will get to a house, or a road. I would rather be out there, running with bare feet over whatever is on the ground, than be chained to the radiator waiting for Robert to keep hurting me.

I tiptoe, I never understand why they do it on TV, but it’s the only thing I can do. I pray that the wooden floors in this old cottage don’t squeak. I really need to move silently without Robert hearing me. I pray with every step I take toward the door.

I look back at Robert just as I reach the door and reach up to open it.

“I don’t think so.” Robert grabs my hand and slaps me hard across the face, which makes me take a step back. “I see it’s time to teach you again.” He pushes me to the ground and tries to get on top of me, but I quickly kick his knee, hard enough for him to scream in pain, and take a step back from me.

This is my only chance to get out of here. I need to run. As I crawl toward the door, he grabs my ankle. I try to kick him again, a few times, until his hand loosens enough for me to get out of his grip.

I quickly get up, and run out of the door. I don’t look behind me. I need to keep moving forward. I sprint with everything I have. My bare feet are breaking twigs as I run over them, and each time my feet hit the ground the pain rushes through me. I know I’ve got a lot of cuts now, but I don’t care. My lungs are beginning to burn as I fight to breathe, the burn is becoming too much. I rest against a tree to get some air into my lungs, but make sure to look behind me when I hear footsteps coming closer.

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