Page 1 of However You Want Me

PROLOGUE

Dean

Tonight feels different.

Almost like that first time when I saw her across the room and knew she was innocent and worthy of so much more than this. We’re so close to the end. I know it. I can feel it in the marrow of my bones.

The evening air is crisp and my breath forms a fog outside her bedroom window. Behind me is only the woods since she lives on the backroad. It’s quiet apart from the sounds of the night. The sky darkens as I slip my hands into the jacket pockets and watch her undress.

Just for me.

I know she does it just for me. The way she arches her back to tease me. Exposing her slender neck so I can imagine kissing her right there, just beneath the shell of her ear. Her curves toy with me and my needs as her blouse becomes a puddle of silk at her feet. Bared for me with only a strip of cloth separating her cunt from my prying gaze.

The glow of the bedroom light dims when she flicks the light off.

I can imagine the creak of the bed as she climbs beneath the covers. I’ve heard it so many times before. My cock presses against the zipper of my jeans and I hold back a groan as I force myself to leave her sight.

The keys in my pocket jingle as I make my way around the side of the house to the backdoor.

It’ll all be over with soon. There will be nothing standing between us. Not the nightmares of what once was. Not the pain that lingers and keeps a grip on the thread of sanity I have left.

Haley

It’s all in my head but I swear I can feel him.

The sheets chill my naked skin as my eyes adjust to the dark. The bed is empty but I stare at the lone pillow, wondering how long it may remain that way.

My gaze drops to where the pillowcase meets the sheet and I know the notebook is hidden beneath it. I can feel its secrets, its confessions… the vivid dreams I’ve scribbled away in the darkest of the nights.

Turning onto my back, I let out a heavy sigh and close my tired reddened eyes. The relief is immense.

But then I see him again.

I see it all play out and my throat tightens.

If I had never kissed him… none of this would have ever happened.

It was a kiss that changed everything over a decade ago.

A single moment where we thought we could escape. The sirens wail in my memory, the flashing lights force my heart to race as if it’s all happening now. As if I’d just pulled the fire alarm. As if we’re racing down the hall in the middle of the night, praying for the Devil to stay soundly asleep in the heat of chaos.

Tears leak from the corner of my eyes.

“Run away with me,” he whispered and it’s like I can feel his warm breath kissing my neck like it did that night.

I stared into his desperate eyes, full of pain from what we endured, and I could only beg him, “Kiss me first.”

The water sprayed down around us, as he stared back at me, his chest rising and falling. We’d already made our choice. What was one more going to change?

“I don’t even know your name,” he murmured as others ran in a blur behind him.

“I know you though. I see you.” I told him and I’ve never felt so honest in my life.

That’s when the screams started.

Breaking up the moment… and yet.

A creak from the hall floorboards pulls me back from the memory. Grounding myself in this moment where it is all in the past. This is only trauma brought back by the recent events.

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