Page 36 of Honey's Special Roux

How could I be okay with a killer as a boyfriend? How could I start a family with him when he lived such a dangerous life? Our future children deserved better.

I deserve better.

Several Weekslater

“I know that ain’t who I think it is,” Mouse joked as I entered the house.

“What’s up, fool?” I asked as I dapped him up.

“Man, I ain’t ever thought we’d see you again. I heard you on Merlot’s shitlist.” TK chuckled as I dapped him up.

I sat down and lit my blunt. They were playing a game of 2k against each other. Mouse was the Houston Rockets, and TK was the Los Angeles Lakers. They were both playing lazily compared to the heated matches we’d get into back in the day.

“I was down, man. After getting shot, I had to go through a couple weeks of physical therapy to make sure shit healed probably and still functions the same.”

“How are you? I heard about the shooting and reached out, but you never hit me back,” Mouse commented as he took a pull of his blunt before locking back into the game.

I removed the blunt from my ear and lit it. Once the smoke had entered my lungs and mellowed my mood, I replied. “I was in the doghouse with Honey and Merlot. I ain’t been looking at my phone much or been in a mood to respond to anybody.”

“We told you how many times to fix your temper and tighten up, but your hardheaded ass continued down this self-destructive path. Shit ain’t cool.” TK shook his head.

With another long pull of the blunt, I tried to find my words. Some things had been weighing heavy on my chest since the night Merlot came to visit my hospital room. The moment he’d revealed the report on Gee’s crew, I regretted letting Honey stay in the room. When she excused herself out of the room, I felt like shit.

“Marquise, your actions are creating too many issues in my cartel. I love you because you’re my sister’s son, but shit needs to change. On everything I love, you need to get in line or get jumped out.” Merlot’s tone left no room for arguing.

“What do you need me to do?”

“Get your rebellious ass spirit in line. Start by making sure all of those boys in the hospital don’t wake up to see tomorrow. Clean up your messes and come holler at me when you’re done.”

It took a few calls to handle the young boy and Gee. By the end of the following week, they had pictures photoshopped onto those ghetto clouds. It was for the best. It ended a war and made folks put some respect on me as second in command with Merlot’s crew.

“I’m in a tough predicament. This is the most power I’ve ever had in the cartel. I’m damn near running shit, but it’s just… I know if I continue down this path, I’m going to lose the one person I love the most. I already test her limits daily. I don’t think she’d continue to let me do my dirt and come back to her.” I let out a frustrated breath.

“What do you want more? Power in the streets or a woman who loves you more than anybody else?” Mouse asked.

“The answer is easy, but we all know the process of leaving Merlot’s gang.”

TK and Mouse shared a knowing look. Most men died when they brought the idea to Merlot about living a clean lifestyle. Merlot was an old-school gangster. He believed in the code of street ethics. When it came to leaving the family, he got that shit back in blood.

“Look, since Merlot is your blood family, maybe he’ll take it easy on you.” TK’s statement was almost comical. Merlot had never been the “take it easy” type of leader. He loved to make an example of niggas, and I wouldn’t be any different.

“I know what I want to happen. I know I need to put the cartel behind me and make a life with Honey she’d be proud to share with the world.”

My lady was going to take the culinary world by storm. She hadn’t explicitly told me about all the offers coming her way, but I knew they were a huge deal. I had to live a life she could share in the magazines when she became a household name like that one chef who got famous from yelling at contestants on his show. It didn’t matter what household you lived in; someone knew his name. Honey Hix needed to have a man worth a damn by her side when her talents took her to unimaginable heights.

“I’m gon’ do it.”

TK and Mouse both tore their eyes away from the television to look at me. It would have been comical in any other situation. The concern on their features confirmed I’d be on a tough journey to freedom.

“We gon’ pray for you, Marq. This shit gon’ be hard, but you got this. You gon’ be the example of a nigga who did the right thing and was rewarded for it.” TK dapped me up.

“You got enough money set aside to make sure you can transition to a legit job? You’re used to juggling hundreds of thousands of dollars. Can you maintain that lifestyle when you get jumped out?” Mouse always provided a different perspective.

I nodded. “I got a lot put aside. My big hits always went to savings while the little petty shit was my play money.”

“Good shit.” TK nodded.

“When do you think you’ll be able to set that meeting up?” Mouse asked.

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