Page 68 of Honey's Special Roux

“Quis, go back in the house and ask Pawpaw to clean your face, okay?”

“Okay, Mommy.” Quis gathered his new items and went back into the house.

When the door closed, Marquise stood up to his full height and sighed. He stepped close to me and looked down at me. I froze in place, unable to break the gaze.

“I don’t expect you to want to be with me again—yet—but I can’t let you keep me out of his life.”

“Okay.”

“I know you have a lot to plan for your grandmother’s funeral, but I’d like to spend some time with y’all next weekend.”

“I don’t mind, but we’re going to be going back to Los Angeles, eventually. Not right away because I have a lot to do for my family, but I’m not staying in Katy forever.”

The look on his face made my heart sink. I shouldn’t have said anything yet.

“You’ve got me fucked up, Honey.”

Here we go.

Quis wasa spitting image of me. When my eyes locked on him, it was like I’d seen a younger version of myself. I was at a loss for words for only a moment before I blinked out of my stupor and had the first conversation with my child. He was so well-mannered, something I never was as a child.

I didn’t need Honey to confirm to me Quis was mine. I could feel it in my soul. We made Quis with our love… a distant memory now.

I missed six years of my child’s life because I went to prison without a clue about his existence. What could I do to be a present father? What could I do to make up for lost time? A couple of toys and an outfit weren’t shit in the grand scheme of things.

“Marquise, don’t start your shit.”

“What do you mean, don’t start my shit? You’re about to snatch my son away from me again, and I’m not letting that shit happen. You got the game fucked up if you think I’m not about to be present in his life now.”

She sighed. “That’s not what I’m saying at all.”

“Then what are you saying? Make it clear to me because I’m not understanding.”

“All I’m saying is, we’re going to figure something out, but I do not have the bandwidth to handle all of that right now. Between the funeral, my parents, and my career, I can’t think clearly enough to create a plan with you right now. I thought I had fifteen years to prepare, and right now, I’m overextended.”

I nodded. “Don’t worry about it. I’ll figure some shit out and get back to you. You know where I work and where I live, so I’ll see you both around.”

“Okay.”

I gave her one final look before I shook my head and walked across the grass to my uncle and aunt’s house. I walked in and slammed the door.

“What’s going on?” Aunt Dee walked out of the kitchen with concern on her aged features.

“Did you know Honey had my kid?” I asked.

Her features softened into one of guilt as she reluctantly nodded. She reached for my hand, but I moved it out of the way. Everyone knew about my child, and no one thought to tell me. The betrayal was real.

“Y’all knew I had a kid out here in the world, and nobody told me anything?” The volume of my voice rose in anger. My uncle walked around the corner to see what all the commotion was.

“We respected Honey’s decision and figured she’d tell you when the time was right.” Aunt Dee stepped closer to me and tried to hold my hand.

“Watch out.” I stepped away from her. I didn’t have a right to be upset, but I was.

“Calm down, nephew. You got misguided anger, and you need to check that shit right the fuck now.” Uncle Cee cleared his throat as he stepped beside his wife and wrapped a protective arm around her shoulder.

It was commendable to see him step for his lady. I was once the same way with Honey. I no longer had that type of connection. Shit sucked.

“Look, I’m not trying to fuck up my early release. It’s just frustrating as hell to feel left out on something as big as the existence of my child. I ain’t have no family. The streets raised me. I want to give my offspring a better life than what I had, and I’m already at a disadvantage. This shit sucks.”

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