Page 74 of Honey's Special Roux

“Get out of your head and talk to me. I was once your safe space. Let me be that.”

My bottom lip trembled. “I’m just so frustrated, Key. I’m frustrated with you, with my family, with myself… I missed out on so much time with Granny Janie because I was running from the memories of you. I was running from everything associated with you. Instead of being there with my favorite lady during her last moments, I was in a completely different time zone, with no clue about what the fuck was going on with her. I spent most of my time with celebrities—people I didn’t give a single fuck about. I could have made more memories with her. I could have let Quis make more memories with her—” My heart ached as the first sob escaped from my lips. The gut-wrenching cry shook me to the core.

“Let that shit out, Honey.” Marquise pulled me into a tight hug, and the feel of his arms around me made me unravel completely. I clung to him as he held me. I cried for what felt like an eternity.

When the tears finally calmed down, the weight of the world lifted off my shoulders.

“I probably look a mess, huh?”

“Hell naw. You’re even more beautiful now.”

I waved him off while I chuckled. “Boy, bye.”

“I’m serious. Your laughter made it back into those beautiful brown eyes I’ve always loved.”

A red hue tinted my cheeks. “Stop it.”

“Why?”

“I’d rather not find myself crying for a second time today.”

He licked his lips as his eyes lit up with an unfamiliar emotion. “I got a question for you.”

Oh, Lord. What does he have to say?

Honey was endgame for me.The calm and security I felt when we were together reinforced the thought every time. Honey was my soulmate, my heart in human form, and my anchor. I would go to the ends of the earth for her. I wanted to be a better man for her—even after she hid a child from me.

“When we first got reconnected, we started a conversation you weren’t ready to have. I still don’t want to rattle you after you just buried your grandmother, but I have to ask. Can I create a relationship with my son? Can I make up for the years we missed out on creating a bond?” I rubbed my hands together.

She wiped at her eyes and sniffled a few times. “I’m really sorry, Marquise. I did what I felt was safest for the both of us. I couldn’t bring my baby to see his daddy in prison. I didn’t want him exposed to any of that life.”

“That’s not what I asked. I understand why you did what you did. I understand it all, baby. I just need to know if now that I’m out, can you let me be a present and active father? Can you let me make memories with my son? Can I learn his likes, his dislikes, his nightly routines? Can I teach him how to ride a bike, catch a football, and dribble a basketball?”

Honey turned to me and held my hand. She smiled up at me with soft eyes. “Yes. You can do that.”

“So, how long are you staying before you leave across the country again? I need to organize family time and my work schedule. Unfortunately, as a condition of my early release, I have to keep good standing with a job for six months, minimum.”

Honey smiled. “I’ll figure something out. Quis and I catch flights often. I also know it’ll take a few weeks to get all of my parents’ debt taken care of.”

“Can you unblock me?”

She giggled. “I sure did block you and everybody associated with you. I’ll unblock y’all, I guess.”

I shook my head. “Bighead ass.”

“Look, I was serious about protecting my son from getting hurt by you. I’m still on the fence because I don’t know what your temper is like these days, but I’m hopeful and optimistic—still cautious.”

“I understand it, for real. Thank you for being cool about me being an active father too. You know I grew up in a shit show. I don’t want the same for our child, either.”

She nodded. “Of course.”

As we talked, a goose waddled up to Honey. Honey smiled down at the long-necked, oversized duck, and stuck her hand out to pet it. Instead of letting her pet it, the goose bit her.

“Ow!” Honey hollered.

“Quack!” The goose expanded its wings as if to buck up at Honey. This woman stood up and bolted down the stone path.

The goose was hot on her tail and almost took flight to catch Honey. I stood up as my sides hurt from the laughter. Honey looked like Cindy running down the hallway from the scene inScary Movie2,.

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