Page 60 of Roommate's Guide to Love

Quinn laughs. “Oh, Uncle Porter…I say this in the most sincere Southern way…but bless your heart.”

guide to love rule #84

It’s impossible to not be attracted to a man wearing a backward hat while shopping for baby clothes.

17

quinn

Stella: QUINN ELIZABETH BANKS. WAKE UP. NOW.

I hearthe phone vibrate from the nightstand next to Porter’s bed, Grace sleeping peacefully between the two of us on his California King. Though, the term “sleep” is relative. I maybe dozed off for a few hours, but I think we were both so nervous that something would happen to her—since we didn’t have a crib for her to sleep in—that neither of us really slept more than a few minutes here and there.

Andthat’swhy I’m not freaking out that I technically slept in the same bed as Porter for the first time in eight years. Because it wasn’t sleep. It was random naps with a baby between us.

Totally doesn’t count.

Quinn: What are you talking about and why are you shouting at me?

Stella: Um, maybe because someone saw you at the late-night pharmacy buying diapers. Care to explain, since I’m pretty sure you weren’t being a good aunt and getting them for your niece?

Simon: I can confirm that no diapers have been delivered to my daughter. Why is that? Huh Quinn? DON’T YOU LOVE YOUR NIECE?

I roll out of bed, careful to not wake Grace or Porter as I go sit in the chair in the corner of his room. I’ve sat in this chair many times, though normally it’s to put my clothes back on before I leave.

Quinn: I’m going to need everyone to quit shouting at me.

Ainsley: I promise to not shout, but I am going to need to know why you were buying diapers.

I let out a sigh, because I really thought I could make it more than twelve hours before anyone would realize what’s happening here. Damn small-town gossip mill.

Quinn: Long story short, Porter’s estranged sister abandoned her baby at the bar with a note. She wants Porter to raise her. He was panicked. So I’m helping out.

Maeve: Holy shit.

Simon: Another member of the Dad Squad! Love it! Tell him I’ll order his shirt. Initiation will be next week.

Ainsley: Is that why he texted you last night?

It takes me a second to remember what she’s talking about. Those emoji texts feel like they happened a lifetime ago.

Quinn: Yeah. That was it. He didn’t know what to do.

Stella: Smart. Though I don’t know if you’d be the one to call.

Quinn: Hey! I kept her alive last night. And changed a poopy diaper!

Ainsley: I’m proud of you. How old is she?

Quinn: Ten months? She’s a little doll baby.

I walk over to the bed and text a picture of a sleeping Grace next to a sleeping Porter. The scene is too cute, with his hand on her stomach, her sleeping like a little starfish under his touch.

It’s enough to make the ovaries combust.

Not mine. But I’m sure someone’s.

Keep telling yourself that Quinn…

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