Page 78 of Roommate's Guide to Love

Every day with Quinn I learn something new about her, which is funny because I thought all of my learning these days would be about how to raise a kid. But nope. I’m learning more and more about the woman who is unknowingly driving me wild every single day.

For example: Since she never spent the night, I didn’t realize she likes to sleep in boxer shorts that she rolls up so high that the bottom of her ass cheeks hang out. I also didn’t know that she likes to dance when she doesn’t think anyone is watching and that she has a tendency to talk in her sleep. Oh, and she refuses to ask me for help when it comes to getting lids off of jars. Though I don’t push back too hard. It’s cute to watch her bite her lip when she gets that determined look in her eye.

“Oh! I almost forgot!” Simon yells as he claps his hands. “I have a present for you. It’s next door.”

“A present? For me?” Did I miss something in my Quinn daydream? “Don’t you mean Grace? Which by the way, thank you for everything you’ve given us. You have no idea how much I appreciate it.”

He waves me off. “Happy to help the newest member of the Dad Squad.”

“Is he still going on about the Dad Squad? You can’t just make fetch happen, Simon. ” Charlie asks as she comes over to pour me a cup of coffee. “Don’t listen to him, Porter. This is not a real club.”

“Yes I can, and yes it is,” he says, giving her a quick kiss on the cheek. “Be right back!”

Charlie and I watch in confusion as Simon runs out of the diner and makes a sharp right into the space next door that houses his real estate firm.

“He’s a lot,” she says. “But he’s all mine.”

“And Rolling Hills thanks you for that,” I say. “Oh, is there a highchair I can use? Quinn is bringing Grace.”

“Of course. Let me go grab it for you.”

“No. I got it,” I say. “But can you bring over Quinn’s coffee order? I think it’s a caramel cold brew? With sweet cream cold foam?”

This makes Charlie’s eyes light up. “You remember her coffee order?”

I shrug, not wanting to make a big deal out of it. “She drinks enough of them.”

“Sure…that’s it,” Charlie says. But before I can ask her what that’s supposed to mean, Simon comes flying back in, a wrapped box in his arms.

“What the fuck?” I ask as he slides into the booth, a little out of breath. “You were serious?”

“As a heart attack,” he says as he passes it across the table to me. “On behalf of the Rolling Hills Dad Squad, I hereby bestow upon you your official membership gift.”

“So there are others in this group?”

“Right now it’s just me and Wes. I want Maeve’s husband to get in, but he lives in Nashville so I have to check the bylaws,” he says. “I have some holdouts, but that’s just because they’re grumpy bastards. But it’s going to take off. Just wait and see. Especially since now we can have our monthly meetings at The Joint.”

“You’re ridiculous.” I start to open the box and am for some reason nervous, though that has to do with Simon’s excitement and Charlie’s look of exasperation.

“It’s a polo shirt!” Simon yells before I can even see through the tissue paper.

And yup, underneath the pile of tissue paper, is a pink polo shirt. And not just any shirt, one with the embroidered logo “R.H. Dad Squad. EST: 2025.”

“Every new dad is going to get this,” Simon says. “We went with pink because Grace is a girl, but if you’re opposed, or if Grace isn’t a pink kind of girl, we have yellow and green. You know, because we’re inclusive as fuck.”

I laugh and fold it back up to put in the box. “Thanks, man. I appreciate it.”

“Anytime,” he says. But before he can say anything else, the front door swings open, and in walks my two girls.

No. My one girl, and the woman whom I wish was mine.

“There she is!” Simon jumps up from the booth and runs to the door, snatching Grace out of Quinn’s hold. And in true Grace form, she just looks at him like he’s the strangest man in the world.

My niece’s confused face never seems to disappoint. Combine it while she’s wearing a huge blue and white checkered bow, and it just makes the interaction that much funnier.

“Good to see you too, Simon,” Quinn says as she pulls her arm out from his as it got tangled in the baby transfer.

“Oh, shush. You’re old news. But this one…well, this one here is all the talk of the town, aren’t you, sweet girl? When are you going to come play with your future best friend Lainey?”

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