Page 17 of Cover Story

‘Bloody ’ell,’ Aaron said, looking past them, ‘That’s Bryant.’

They followed his eyes to a nondescript thirty-something man in a polo shirt with a group of male friends.

‘Sorry, I have to say hello. Murder squad detective. One ofmy best contacts.’ Aaron pushed his hands into his pockets and wandered over, with his wolfish sort of insouciance.

‘So, you’re not going to believe this,’ Shilpa said, confidentially to Bel, as if Connor wasn’t present, ‘Tim and Rufus have paraded their new girlfriends on Instagram. Together. A foursome, like.’ Shilpa did trout pout lips and a peace sign with one hand, then mimed a face puckered in a kiss.

Bel’s palms and underarms became warm. It didn’t sound like Tim and she didn’t want to assimilate this news with the intern watching her. ‘Ah, really,’ she said neutrally.

Bel’s ex-long-term boyfriend, Tim, and Shilpa’s ex-husband, Rufus, had become friends in the three years or so span when the relationships ran concurrent, Bel splitting with Tim six months ago and Shilpa and Rufus, six months before that. On the unbelievably horrible day when Bel ended things with Tim, he accused her of ‘following Shilpa out the door’.

She suspected that mistaken idea had part-fuelled what sounded like this uncharacteristic fit of passive aggression from him, because he’d know Radio Shilpa would broadcast it.

Tim wasn’t an extremely online person. He only ever used Instagram when he and his men friends wanted a rain pebble-dashed record of reaching the summit at Scafell Pike.

‘A champion two-man trolling, like something out ofSex & The City, and you missed it thanks to your policy of being invisible online,’ Shilpa said.

Bel was distinctly uncomfortable at Connor Adams gathering all these acorns about her. He was pretending to intently browse his phone and mind his business.

‘Well, good luck to them,’ Bel continued, ‘I’ve got no right to complain.’

‘I exercise my right to complain, I think it’s tacky, crass and uncalled for. I don’t want their antics rubbed in my face like a dog being toilet trained with its mess. Me and Rufus said vows in front of two flavours of God. I’ve not so much as soft launched a Hinge date yet, out of respect for what we had.’

Bel always forgot Shilpa’s metabolism of alcohol: she took off like Concorde, then hit altitude and started cruising at a level. They were currently in the ‘nose cone pointed upwards, rapid ascent’ phase.

‘You could not follow Rufus on Instagram, am I thinking too logically?’

‘Yes. You are thinking too logically,’ Shilpa said. ‘Rufus and I are locked in a fake amicable follow-back to keep tabs on one another, while demonstrating we’re not bothered. We’re playing 4D chess, liking each other’s posts immediately to show we’re not pussies with each other on mute, too. He’s the first view on all my Stories. I at least try to wait until his have been up an hour.’

‘But why?’ Bel said.‘You left him?’

She said these last three words in a stagey hush, which was ridiculous given the only person listening in was Connor, who could hear what she was saying with perfect clarity. It was more to communicatecan we notto Shilpa, which was barely less futile, as Shilpa was in a vigorousyes we shallmode.

‘There is an aggravating aspect which maypique your interest,’ Shilpa said, tightening her jumpsuit belt, which Bel mimed throttling her with.

‘My interest is stubbornly un-piqued,’ Bel said.

‘Prepare to feast on your own words,’ Shilpa said. ‘Pique incoming.’

11

‘Connor,’ Shilpa tapped his arm, ‘back me up on this. Do you follow any of your exes?’

Bel squirmed. She didn’t want this man to know her middle name, let alone her personal life dramas.Why oh why didn’t she leave them at Platzki’s! Damn her nice manners.

‘Uhm …’ Connor paused. ‘Yeah, I think so? I’ve been with my girlfriend five years and I’m trying to remember who qualifies as an ex that I’m in touch with.’

‘Awww, how romantic. No one matters now, before her? What’s she called?’ Shilpa said, not faltering receiving the Has A Girlfriend information.

‘Jennifer. To be honest, it’s more that I’m casting back to my mid-twenties and I had nothing very settled before Jen. Yeah …’ Bel was glad not to be in Connor’s mind’s eye as his brow furrowed with the effort of recollection, ‘One or two, I think?’

Was Bel imagining that Connor was being far nicer, and gentler of voice, to Shilpa than he’d ever been to her?

‘There you go,’ Shilpa said, turning to Bel. ‘It’s the etiquette now. But there’s an aggravating factor … Ooh ,thank you.’

The barman presented her with her Troublemaker, from the tray he’d set down. Had she eaten, Bel wondered?

Connor sipped his Clover Club, said thank you to Bel and returned to pretending he had things to inspect on his iPhone.