Page 36 of Old Money

“I’ll go slow,” he whispers, moving in and out of me as he holds himself over me. When I’ve adjusted to him more, he reaches down and hooks a hand under one of my legs, throwing it up over his shoulder. He scoots closer to me on his knees then brings the other one up, picking up the pace. The angle makes my eyes roll back into my head, and I claw at the sheets like I’m rabid.

“Julian!” I scream out, and he tightens his grip on me, moving faster and faster. He spreads my legs slightly, reaching down and putting the pads of his fingers on my clit and moving them over and over. Just as I’m feeling like I’m going to explode, he pulls out of me, taking my soul with him. He flips me around so that I’m on my stomach, pressing me down and pulling my ass up to him. He bends down and kisses my right ass cheek then pushes himself back into me from behind. As he starts going again, he reaches a hand around, pulling me up so that his chest is to my back. Then his hand moves back down to my clit as he circles it, pounding in and out of me. I lay my head back against his shoulder, wrapping an arm around him.

“Julian,” I puff. “Julian…”

He groans in my ear, his breathing erratic as he moves. And then, everything goes white. Stars fill my eyes as my whole body shakes against his. He wraps his arm around my middle, holding me steady to him as I sink all my weight back. Our bodies are slick with sweat, sticking to each other. He kisses my shoulder then my neck before slowly pulling out of me.

The aftershock rolls through me as he climbs off the bed and goes to the bathroom. He’s back a moment later, and my stomach starts to churn. What happens now?

I pull the covers up to my chest, lying on the bed as he pulls his boxers on. He looks at me as he walks toward the bed, and I brace myself for what’s next.

“Can I stay?” he asks. I can’t help but smile, as childlike as it might make me look.

“You pay the rent,” I say. “Of course you can stay.”

He smiles as he gets in the bed, pulling the covers up onto both of us. He snakes an arm underneath me and pulls me into him, spooning me and burying his face in the back of my neck.

I know I have him in this moment, but I don’t know for how long.

And the problem is, now that I’ve had him, I don’t want to let him go.

We lie still for a few moments with nothing but the moon lighting up the room.

“What is it, Sawyer?” he asks, and I feel myself get stiff. I clear my throat.

“What do you mean?” I ask. He sighs, flipping me over so I’m facing him on the pillow.

“Tell me what’s got your heart rate going like we never finished,” he says.Fuck.Am I that easy of a read, or does he just know me?

I bite my lip, and he reaches a hand up, caressing my cheek and tucking my hair behind my ear.

“What…what happens now?” I ask. His eyebrows knit together as his eyes narrow on me.

“What do you mean?”

I clear my throat.

“Do we just…I mean, are we…what does this…”

“I meant what I said, Sawyer. I don’t want anyone else to have you, and I don’t want anyone else. What about you?”

It’s almost laughable. Is he askingmeif I want to be exclusive? With the gorgeous billionaire hero I haven’t gone a minute without thinking about since we met?

“I don’t want anyone else either,” I say. He smiles. “But…but you said you don’t do relationships. You don’t?—”

“I don’t,” he says. “I never have. But I’ve never had someone…anyone in my life who sees me like you do, Sawyer. And I can’t seem to let you go.”

I feel a lump in my throat.

“So…”

“But it’s complicated, Sawyer. I can’t have a normal relationship. So if we were to do this, you would have to decide how you want things to be.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean that if we are together, the world will know. If we go to dinner anywhere but Tilly’s or Dino’s, the world will know. My family will know. People on the internet will know. And they will have things to say about it. In an hour’s time, they’ll know your name, where you’re from, where you go to school, your mother’s name. They’ll know how we met. They’ll dig into the shooting. Look, I’ve never told a soul about you—not even my brothers. And it’s not because I’m ashamed or because I’m being sneaky. Honey, I’d proudly show you off to the whole damn world. Happily get the grilling from my brothers about being a cradle robber. But if I do that, everything changes, Sawyer. And it can’t go back.” I swallow, pushing myself up to lean against the headboard. I tuck the covers around myself tighter, losing myself in thought. “I want you, Sawyer. I don’t even know what this looks like. I’ve never wanted this before. But I can’t hurt you. I won’t. So it has to be whatyouwant.”

God, it would be nice to see this through. The way he makes me feel like the only girl on the planet, even when he has the whole planet at his fingertips. The way he feels like home. But I enjoy my time in the dark. Sometimes, it’s nice not being seen.

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