Page 70 of Take Me Home for Christmas

“And I want you to be my best man.” He cautiously set down his fork. “But only if you tell me what’s wrong.”

I was flabbergasted, by the ask and by his ability to sense that something was off. “I’m honored.” Choking up, I said, “You’re like a brother to me. We can talk about me some other time.”

“You are my brother, in every way that matters.” Gabe’s tone told me he wasn’t going to be dismissed. “So, what’s going on with Mia?”

“I had a great time. She’s got an amazing family. She’s amazing.”

“But?”

“I screwed up.”

He frowned. “Does that mean you slept together? Because you already did that before.”

“I don’t kiss and tell.”

“You do if you want my advice.” He went back to slurping down the spaghetti.

“Yes, okay, that was amazing too. But then…”

Gabe stopped eating again and checked his watch. “You’re going to have to get this story out faster if you want my advice before I have to leave.”

“Before I left, Brunner implied that the practice was going to offer me the job, and I didn’t tell Mia. Honestly, I was trying to figure it all out. They don’t seem to want women in the practice. They overwork everyone. On the other hand, maybe if I join, I can be the one to set things right.” I was getting it all out fast, so I had to take a breath. “Mia thinks I kept the secret on purpose. That I was even trying to sway her away from the job when I told her she’d be great at heme-onc.” I looked up. “I hate what they’re doing. But I’ve been dreaming of working in that practice for years. It’s…it’s kind of in my blood.”

Gabe was shaking his head and looking at me like—well, like I sucked. I thought that he, of all people, would sympathize. “So you didn’t tell her about the shady job offer, mistake number one. And you tried to talk her into applying for heme-onc, so now she thinks you were assuaging your guilt, number two.”

I dropped my head into my hands. I sucked. “What’s number three?”

“Number three is that you seem willing to take a job where they treat you and other people badly just for the sake of saying you have that job. What would Dr. Pendergast do?”

I jerked up my head. I stared across the table at my best friend, who’d just asked a ten-million-dollar question. Of course I knew. “He would’ve told them to take their job and stick it somewhere where the sun don’t shine.”

He never would have compromised his integrity for the prestige of having a job.

Suddenly, all that caffeine must’ve kicked in, because the clouds finally parted. Everything became crystal clear. Somehow, I’d forgotten who I was.

I’d complained about no one really loving me. But the truth was, I didn’t understand what it was to love another person back. I’d let my desire for that job cloud my thinking. I’d put it before Mia.

Gabe sat back and crossed his arms. “Love or the job. Those are your choices.”

Mia

The day after Christmas, the same gold tinsel and colorful lights still looped around the nurses’ station, except the holiday decorations had that tired, the-party-is-over, take-me-down look.

Everything seemed different. Every beep and buzz jarred, yet the ward was oddly quiet. Muffled, as if I had earbuds in my ears that muted the rest of the world. Maybe it was because Bianca and Pedro had both been discharged home, and their fun teenage banter was gone.

Rylee and her family were also long gone, hopefully enjoying a fun and uneventful holiday. The hissing sound of an albuterol nebulizer machine, accompanied by crying, emanated from her old room. It was now occupied by a two-year-old with a viral respiratory infection who was crying in his mother’s arms as she struggled to keep the mask that delivered the treatment on his face.

I went about my work, catching up on everyone. Hospital life went on as normal. Who was I kidding? Everything seemed sad and lifeless.Brax-less.

I didn’t have time to think about my troubles. We had nine admissions that morning alone. The city seemed to be blowing up with post-holiday respiratory illnesses and gastroenteritis.

Right before lunchtime, I ran to the bathroom and bumped into Sam in the call room, sitting on a bottom bunk, pillaging a box of leftover Christmas chocolates. She’d been texting meliterally every hour since Christmas Eve. “Hey,” she said, holding up a box of candy wrapped in bright red foil under my nose. Ordinarily, the rich scent of good chocolate would have worked wonders, but today, it made my stomach churn, so I passed.

She stopped midchew. “Have you eaten breakfast? I’m going to run down and grab you an egg sandwich.” She got up and hugged me. “I’d buy you a drink tonight, but I know you’re on call. How about I take your call for you?”

“You’re a good friend.” As I hugged her back, I fought back a sudden swell of tears. This would not do. I had a long, harrowing day ahead of me, not to mention a busy night ahead. I rubbed my pounding temples. “Got any Advil?”

My pager went off. It was Val, the charge nurse, telling me that Dr. Brunner was waiting at the desk to talk with me. It was probably about an admission. They were coming left and right today. I somehow had to get my game on fast.

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