Page 78 of Torn

At the sight of him, the organ wedged in her chest rams against her breastbone. Her molars gnash, stripping through enamel as she pants. She’d been zooming faster than she had realized.

Based on Anger’s thudding torso, wheezy intakes, and disarrayed hair, he must have bounded across the buildings at a lightning pace to reach her. Desperation practically reeks from him, along with remorse, and shame, and fear. The distrustful mixture congeals like phlegm on her tongue, a cloying buildup that offends her. It wipes out any residual longing, giving Merry strength that she hadn’t known herself capable of.

“This is where I first saw you,” he rasps.

“I saw you first,” she seethes, unsure why it matters.

He gives her a haggard smile. “I disagree.”

Merry’s board thwacks the ground, and she plants her foot on the platform. “Get out of my way, God of Anger.”

His hand steals out to touch her. “Merry—”

“Don’t.” She recoils. “Don’t. You. Dare.”

His gloved fingers contort into a fist and plummet to his side. “What you saw—it’s not what you think.”

A humorless titter skids out of her. “That’s the best you can do? Soooooo superior to mortals, yet in a moment of weakness, you’re no better than any conventional douchebag in this realm.”

“I wasn’t cheating on you. It wouldn’t be possible.”

It’s the wrong thing to say. Anger swallows his words, a sign that he’s realized his error.

So he hadn’t cheated only because it wasn’t possible? Because Love hadn’t seen him? Because she’s taken?

Merry narrows her eyes. He hadn’t betrayed her, but he would have.

I will not weep. I will not.

Anger rakes through his hair. “No,” he backtracks. “No, that’s not what I meant.”

Her voice splinters. “You philandering bastard.”

“I didn’t know she’d be there—”

“That doesn’t make a difference!”

“You’re right, it doesn’t!” he yells back. “You can’t blame me for having a past. That doesn’t go away! I needed one more moment with her, one yielding moment in order to let go.”

“You know what I think? I think you wanted her because she was the only one you couldn’t tame. Because, unlike mortals, she could stand up to you. Because she gave you an opponent. Because that mattered more than having an actual partner.”

“Don’t belittle my feelings! I don’t have to defend them!”

“Right,” she says. “Who cares what I think or how I feel? I’m just a distraction, a starry-eyed waif who can’t take a hint. But hey, why not enjoy what’s offered so freely?”

Anger’s features constrict. “That’s not…I would never…it was never like that with you. I never meant to hurt you.”

The words strap around her midriff. It sounds like he’s alluding to more. Not that Merry wants to hear more, because she’s endured enough.

He shakes his head, like he doesn’t know, or like she won’t understand. She’s been attached to him like adhesive, and for the first time, she regrets it. The very thought, all the ways she’d flung herself at him, mortifies her.

Meanwhile, this lame god claims that he never meant to hurt her.

“Whatdidyou mean to do?” she demands.

“Every moment between us meant more than you know,” Anger pleads. “It was real. But it doesn’t change who I used to be.”

“And sadly, it doesn’t change this: I love you.”

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