Page 20 of Return Policy

“Soph… I get why you hate him,” Charlie says gently.She’s the only one who possibly could.“But you can also enjoy a sexy friend with benefits so at least that piece of shit isn’t the last one who touched you.”

“Okay… Can we change the subject?” I groan.

Thinking about Seth always leaves me either enraged or on the edge of an existential crisis. I’m over him—world-record-set-for-pole-vaulting over him—but what he did is embedded permanently in my memory. Moving past it isn’t something I know how to do… or if I even should.

“I’m just saying…” Charlie shrugs. “The best way to get over someone is to getundersomeone else.”

“Never use one guy to forget another,” Sage says uncharacteristically, and Charlie and I both stare at her. “Use two or three.”

The Uber driver snorts again. I’m fully convinced he’s having the best night of his life listening to my friends shit on me.

“Do you have something you’d like to say, Uber Dude?” I snap at him. Sage cackles next to me, and Charlie covers her mouth.

“I think it’s safer if I keep my opinions to myself,” he says.

Sage leans forward and squeezes his shoulder. “Good call.”

Rolling my eyes, I sigh as he pulls up to the curb, and I’m thanking the universe I can finally escape this episode of carpoolMaury.

We head to the dorm, and once in the common area of Sage’s and my place, I throw myself dramatically onto a bean bag and groan. “Ugh, you guys are so fucking embarrassing!”

“Who, us?” Charlie gasps, clutching her chest, feigning offense while sinking down into the other bean bag.

“That Uber driver now knows more about my current life than Janine.”

“I still think it’s weird you’re on a first name basis with your therapist.” Sage walks into her room, tossing a tiny purse on the bed. I’ve been going to see Janine since Chloe died, and I’ve only recently stopped since I moved.

“I think it’s weird you crumple your toilet paper instead of folding it when you shit, but I still love you,” I spit back, and both of them laugh.

“I’m not weird!” Sage calls back. “I’m one of a kind.”

Nodding my head, I tease, “That you are.”

“Okay,” Charlie says, pushing herself off the beanbag. “I’m gonna head back to my dorm.”

“You sure you don’t wanna sleep here?”

“Yeah, I promised Jonathan I’d call him when I got home, so…” She smirks.

“Ohhh! You guys are totes gonna have phone sex.” I waggle my eyebrows.

Charlie rolls her eyes, huffing out a laugh. “See, you need to get laid, babe. It’s all you think about.”

I place my hands on my hips. “Is not!”

“Is too!” Sage calls from her room.

“Okay, you know what, you bitches are nosyandopinionated, so I’m going to excuse myself for the night.”

“Night, Soph,” Charlie calls, heading out the door.

“Night, Joey!” Sage yells.

I’m finally makeup-free, in my pajamas, and slipping into bed. As I reach for my charger to plug in my phone, it vibrates in my hand.

UNKNOWN NUMBER

Unknown Number

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