Page 93 of Return Policy

“Your John Hancock is horseshit,” Elijah taunts, and Noah throws a pen at him.

Charlie’s eyes bounce between them, an amused smile on her lips. “Are you boys done yet?”

“Yes, Ms. Benson.” Noah smirks, eyes raking over her.

Noted.

“Do you guys want something to drink?” I ask, getting up off the couch.

“Water, please,” Charlie replies.

“Tequila… stat,” Elijah says, slapping a hand against the coffee table. I raise my eyebrows, and he sinks back in his seat. “Fine, water.”

As I’m walking toward Elijah’s kitchen, my phone vibrates in my pocket. I tug it out, almost tripping over my own two feet when I see the message.

UNKNOWN NUMBER

Unknown Number

I meant what I said on Halloween. We’re in this together.

Shoving the phone back in my pocket, I swallow hard, trying to push his threat from my mind. Noah joins me in the kitchen as I pour the waters. He bends down, looking into the oven at his baked ziti, and I hope like hell it’s almost finished because my mouth has been Niagara Falls since he put it in.

“Where’d you learn to cook?” I ask him.

“My mom.” He grins proudly. “She taught me how to make her famouspanzerotto frittoby the time I was ten.”

“And it’s paid off!” Elijah calls from the couch. “That shit’s delicious.”

“I went to Italy last summer, and mynonnawouldn’t let me leave until I perfected making ravioli from scratch.”

“Do you speak Italian?” Charlie asks Noah as she scribbles something on her notebook.

“Quando voglio sembrare sexy.”When I want to sound sexy.

She bites her lips to stifle a smile, and I chuckle, carrying the waters back to the table.

“Something funny?” Noah asks me, sitting back down.

“Solo che ovviamente parli italiano.”Just that of course you speak Italian.

Elijah flies forward in his seat, staring straight at me. “Hold up now.Youspeak Italian?”

“Quando voglio sembrare sexy.” I wink at Noah, and he laughs. “Not a ton, but Leah and I spent a few weeks in Italy this summer, and I had to learn some important phrases.”

I place the waters on the coffee table and Elijah pats his lap, so I lower myself onto it. “Say something else.” He grins, slipping a finger under the hem of my shirt, rubbing soft circles on my back.

“Like what?”

“Anything. I just want to hear you talk again.”

“Okay… hmm…” I flick my eyes to the ceiling, trying to think what I should say. Leah and I did quite a bit of practicing after being hit on by a few slimy Italian guys in Positano.Ohhh, yes. That’s the one.“Sei solo un ragazzo eccitato che cerca di bagnarsi il cazzo.”You’re just a horny guy trying to get his dick wet.

Noah chokes on his water, and I giggle as Elijah bites his lower lip. “Damn, that was sexy… Another one,” he rasps out.

I laugh but happily oblige. “Non mi interessa il tuo micropene.”I have no interest in your micropenis.

Noah gasps for air, and Elijah smirks between us. “Care to translate?”

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