Page 29 of Octane

“Okay, this is our last practice before the first race. We’re lucky that the season kicks off here at home, so we have an advantage. We know every turn on this track like the back of our hands, and we’re going to use that to our favor. Right?”

“Right,” Ryder agrees.

No one else says anything, but I see Nate nod his head.

“Alright, finish getting suited up, and let’s have a great practice,” Jackson commands.

He lifts his hands to give each of the guys a high-five, ending with me. I watch as Robby, Nate, Tim, and Ryder high-five one another. I’m a little surprised, though, I try not to let it show too much, when Ryder includes me in his round of high-fives this time.

I take it as a small victory and let the fact that he was the only one to include me roll off my back. I have no time or room in my life to let that kind of negativity in.

* * *

Today’s practicewent really well. I managed to get in front of Robby right at the end, which was huge. I’ve come close to passing each of the guys before today, but I’ve never been able to pull it off. Jackson waves a red flag, letting us know practice is over and to park our cars in the garage.

“Looks like you might have some competition, Robby,” Nate quips when his helmet is off.

I almost don’t believe my ears when I hear it. He hasn’t been outwardly mean to me, but he’s never gone out of his way to accept or include me before, either. Though, I suppose it’s more him giving Robby shit than it is him being nice to me.

“Fuck off, it was one race. She won’t be so lucky next time,” Robby looks at me with a scowl.

“Who said it had anything to do with luck?” I speak up, surprising even myself. I didn’t mean to say it out loud.

“Oooooh!” Nate and Tim laugh at once.

“Watch out,” Nate warns, “Sawyer’s burning you onandoff the track now.”

Although I’m thoroughly confused by their sudden change of heart, I take advantage of their inclusion of me and go with it. Nate pats me on the back as he and Tim walk past me, and the hair on the back of my neck stands up, instantly. It’s like my body knows Daniel is watching even when my mind has forgotten he’s nearby. I turn to look for him, but he’s no longer in the stands. Something tells me he’s still around here somewhere, though, lurking.

No more is said. It’s not like I was picturing my teammates and I skipping out of here like best friends, but I was left wishing there was more conversation between us. I don’t know what else I should have expected, but I look at today as progress.

As I start walking toward my car parked on the other side of the garage, I hear hushed voices talking from behind me. I look back and see that Jackson and Robby are talking about something. Hoping it doesn’t have anything to do with me, I round the corner of the garage and am startled when I see Daniel standing there.

“Oh!” I gasp, my hand flying to my chest. “Daniel, you scared me.”

I notice Nate and Tim up ahead, both having turned their attention to me when they heard my surprise. I try to wave them off and let them know I’m okay, but they stay where they are and stare.

“I saw you earlier, before practice.”

He’s angry because Jackson put his hands on me. Fuck. I don’t know what to say, so I just look at him.

“In your littlehuddle.”

I wait for him to tell me that he saw me flirting with my teammates. He may not have been wrong about the sexual tension between Jackson and I, but he sure ashelldidn’t witness anything inappropriate between me and the other guys.

“Your teammates don’t appear to like you very much. In fact, they don’t seem to want you here at all.”

Oh.

His eyes shoot toward Nate and Tim who, unfortunately, are still standing there, bearing witness to our exchange. I feel the heat of embarrassment flood my cheeks.

“It’s because they know what I know.” Daniel waves his hand in their direction. “You’re not cut out for this, Sawyer. It’s time you put this silly pipe dream to rest.”

Don’t you dare let them see you cry.

Why did they have to stop walking? I could have handled this if there wasn’t an audience. Daniel knew what he was doing. He made sure to do this where he knew there would be witnesses. He figures he can embarrass me into quitting, but he’s wrong.

I can feel the anger in me rise. Had it not been for the slight show of support from Nate moments ago, I don’t know if I’d have the guts to say what I do next, but in this moment, I feel empowered.

---