Page 75 of The Devil's Weakness

“I’m not going to do that, Blade. No matter what you think I am to you, we are not in a relationship. There are so manynormal-peoplethings that we skipped over in such a short amount of time. I don’t know if we could salvage an ordinary relationship no matter how hard we tried.”

He sits forward and takes my hands into his. I feel the electricity in his touch, and I hate that it affects me the way it does.

“There is notrying, Sasha. We will never have an ordinary relationship. My life is far from it, and you’re much too special to ever be considered ordinary. You’re remarkable. Don’t ever strive to just be normal.”

My heart is beating so loudly; it’s any wonder how I even heard what he said. But I did—every Goddamn, earth-shattering word.

He reaches forward and tucks my damp hair behind my ear. As he inches closer to me, my breath hitches, and my eyes snap to his lips. I wait for him to come closer. To try to kiss me again, try to sway me to let him stay. But that’s where it ends. When he pulls away from me, I can’t help but feel disappointed.

“I—,” my voice cracks a little, and I clear my throat. “I’m not going to pack a bag, Blade. I have no immediate plans to spend the night with you again. I’m not ready for that.”

You can add Blade to your list of people that you can’t lie to. There’s no way he believes that.

“And it’s going to be a cold day in hell before I ever walk into that clubhouse willingly. I can’t do it.”

His head bobs up and down a few times as he considers what I’m saying. At least I wasn’t lying about that.

“And I need some time.Alone.I still haven’t been able to process everything that’s happened, and it’s really messing with me.”

He nods his head before standing from the sofa.

“Okay,” is his only response.

He turns and walks for the door without another word. With his eyes fixed on mine, I know that I’m going to give in to him one day. I’ll accept his ass-backward proposal of being his. But today isn’t the day.

“That waswaytoo easy,” I say to the empty room as soon as the door closes behind him.

* * *

Ellie practically tacklesme when I walk through the door of the diner an hour later.

“Oh, Sasha.” She pulls me in for a hug. “I was so worried about you.”

“I know. I’m so sorry again,” I say, nearly suffocating in her blonde curls.

“Come on, let’s go talk in my office.”

I don’t know why I thought I’d be able to get out of this with an “I’m sorry” and “I’ll work a month of doubles to make up for it.” I hate lying to her, but there’s no way I can tell her what happened.

“Have a seat,” she instructs me as she closes her door. I sit in the chair in front of her desk and begin fiddling with the zipper on my purse while I wait for her.

“So,” she begins but doesn’t say anymore.

“So,” I respond awkwardly.

“Are youtrulyokay? I know you’ve been going through a lot these past few years. You’ve been working your ass off around here. If you needed a break, all you had to do was ask.”

Her kind eyes and warm heart nearly shatter the mask I have in place. I take a deep breath and try to keep my emotions locked away. More than I value my life, I can’t bring myself to put someone else in danger by pulling them into my bullshit with the Skull.

But it’s the first time I’ve spoken to anyone without Blade around. The first time I’ve been alone and not imprisoned in four days. I think everything that’s happened is compounding. All the shit I tried tucking away to deal with later is now coming out, and I can feel it start to implode.

But I still don’t know what I’m going to say. Ellie has felt like a mother to me for a very long time. There has been little that I didn’t want to or couldn’t tell her until now. I begin to toy with the idea of telling her, anyway. A girl needs a confidant. Maybe I can tell her but only feed her half-truths? But then I hear Blade’s warning about discretion in my head again.

The last person to talk about Club business got his tongue cut out.

I don’t know if he was telling me the truth or trying to scare me, but I quickly change my half-truth idea.

“It’s like you said. I’ve been worn out for a while. Michael and I got into a huge fight when I went to pick him up that day. I just needed to blow off some steam and clear my head. I left my cell phone behind, stupidly, so he wouldn’t be able to call me. Try and make him fend for himself, you know?”

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