Page 77 of The Devil's Weakness

Because of Blade.

It’s a small thing, but it’s yet another piece of my life shattered because of him. I grab one of the chairs around our small table and press it up underneath the doorknob. That should hold it for now.

“Michael?” I approach him gently, so I don’t scare him.

He’s standing still but swaying back and forth a little. I put my arm around him and direct him back into his room. Helping him into his partially made bed, I pick his blanket up off of the ground and cover him with it.

Peering down at him, my heart breaks. I feel so guilty for leaving the other day. And how we left things tears me to pieces. I pray he wakes up tomorrow, so I have a chance to apologize to him for the way I acted.

I know it was warranted, but after what I’ve gone through since then, I’m inclined to forgive and forget. I place my hand on his head, rubbing my thumb through his hair. Searching his room, visually sifting through all of his shit, I make a mental note to tidy up tomorrow.

It’s fucking disgusting, and it smells like something died in here. I lay a kiss on his forehead before getting ready to leave. As I walk out of his room and close his door, my eye catches sight of something on his dresser, peeking out from underneath of a burnt piece of foil and a discarded bottle cap.

It’s a tiny, empty baggie. On it is a picture of a skull with a knife through its head. Seeing it after hearing Blade talking about Death’s Road gives me chills. Like a bad omen.

I take one more look at Michael before I shut the door. Walking back into the kitchen, I slide the Plan B out of the bag and read the back of it.

May cause menstrual changes, nausea, abdominal pain, fatigue, vomiting, headache… blah, blah, blah. It looks like I have a fun night ahead of me. Compliments, again, of Blade and his lack of consideration for how his actions affect other people.

My eyes catch the warning beneath the side effects:

If you vomit after taking this medication, you could become pregnant. Call your doctor to find out if you should repeat this dose.

“Fucking wonderful,” I say to no one.

Rolling my eyes, I open the box. Tearing through the casing, I take out the single pill, then grab a bottle of water from the refrigerator. Popping the pill into my mouth, I swallow and down half of the remaining water in the bottle.

I didn’t realize how thirsty I was until just now. I bring the water to my room with me. Stopping in my tracks when I get to the doorway. I forgot about my feather covered-floor.

I’ll deal with it tomorrow.

I strip out of my shorts and my bra, and I climb into bed. Finally alone with my thoughts, an unbearable heaviness falls over me as I relive everything from the past few days.

The accident. Fighting with Michael. Being on the run, alone and terrified.

The weight crushes me, and I roll over onto my side, curl into myself, and finally let it all out. All the pain, the fear, the anxiety, leaves me, mixed with my salty tears. It covers me like a weighted blanket that I’m not strong enough to lift.

Blade. Running from him. Blade. Being overpowered by him. Blade. Bound and gagged and forced into his truck.

It was the longest two hours of my life. I was terrified the entire way home that when I got here, I’d be headed straight for a six-foot-deep hole in the earth.

Blade. The cell in the basement. Stone.

My lip throbs where he hit me. My hand burns along the gash that was forced open because of his brutality.

Blade. Blade. Blade.

The worst part is, as I lie here, feeling like I’m suffocating, I yearn for his touch. I want him to come here, take me, and make me forget.

Just like he did last night.

I’m thankful I don’t have any way of getting ahold of him, or I’m certain I would give into my desire and beg him to come back. I’m becoming addicted to him. Just like my brother in the room next to mine, I have an affliction.

I can feel my mind, body, and soul begging to give in to it.

Chapter Twenty-Three

I leftSasha’s house when she asked me to, out of respect for her and the time she needs to process all that she’s been through. It’s the least I could do for her, but if she thinks she’s getting rid of me for good, she better think again.

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