Page 64 of The Devil's Redemption

She nods her head slightly, blinking at me but not speaking. It makes me uneasy. What isn’t she telling me?

“Sasha, tell me. I like when I can read your expressions, but I honestly don’t know if you’re okay right now.”

“No, I’m great,” she breathes. “I… I wondered if it would ever be possible to… Be intimate without thinking about what happened.”

“Did we succeed this time?”

“Mostly. There were a few bits and pieces that forced their way through the block that I was fighting to keep up. But when you gave me those little commands, I was able to push them away. It’s like you knew the moment they popped into my head.”

“One of these days, you’re not going to have to try so hard to keep them at bay. You won’t have to try at all. I promise you that, little girl.”

As I look down at her, at the woman I love, I think about those who came before her. I’ve made and broken many, many promises to countless women over the years, but they were unimportant. Insignificant. Inconsequential. They were the complete opposite of the beautiful girl in bed beside me.

With Sasha, there will be no broken promises.

Chapter Twenty-Two

The German philosopherParacelsus once said, “The main reason for healing is love.”

And I believe him.

I couldn’t do it alone… Heal.

It’s without a shadow of a doubt that I wouldn’t have survived this without Blade. I’m sure if I told anyone my feelings on the matter, they would tell me I wasn’t giving myself enough credit. That I am now and have always been a survivor.

It’s true.

At least it used to be. There comes a time when someone is so beaten down, they lack the will to live. I’ve been there. I’ve seen it. Without Blade, Iwould notbe here right now.

And if, by chance, Ididhappen to make it on my own, I know for damn sure I wouldn’t even think about having sex or being intimate with anyone ever again. I went years without having sex before Blade. After what I went through, I wouldn’t have a problem never being touched by another person ever again.

But what Blade did for me at my apartment a couple days ago was incredible. Something I wasn’t sure could ever be done. And it was his love for me that enabled him to help me so much. Without that love, I would be lost.

Once we finally made it out of bed, he showed me what he and Cap were up to the other day. They completely repainted the front room, covering all traces of the red-painted threat Jasper left on my wall. I was so grateful, I nearly drug him right back into my bedroom. But instead, I simply packed up all my clothing and told him that I couldn’t wait to move in with him.

He said we could stay at my apartment, but we’re safer at the clubhouse for now. Once we catch Jasper, he will let me choose where we’ll be living. I honestly thought I would live in that apartment for the rest of my life. Well, maybe not my whole life. The county would have probably kicked me out at some point. But I never considered moving anywhere else by choice.

Moving into a brand new—to us—place with Blade is intriguing, though. It’s neutral ground, somewhere none of our exes have been. I hate the thought of having sex with Blade on the same mattress that he fucked those whores on. Especially Lizzy. I wonder if I have enough pull to kick her ass to the curb. Tell her to find a new club to whore around in.

Probably not.

“How does that sound?” Blade asks.

Fuck.

I completely missed what he said.

“What? I’m sorry, my mind drifted away for a second.”

“I said we’re going to be having a party tomorrow night. Something for all of us to blow off a little steam. Let loose.”

“Oh. Um, is the whole club going to be there?”

“Yeah, the guys, some friends of the club, the Doxies.”

My face falls when he mentions them.

“I don’t know,” I admit. “I’m not sure I’m feeling up for a party.”

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