Page 145 of Pervade London
Glancing cautiously over at James, I wondered if now was a good time to share what we’d done. “We were about to discuss the ethics of it all.”
“Drive,” snapped James.
“We can talk more later,” added Xavier.
“I’d rather talk now,” I said. “Help me understand this shaky democracy.”
“Well, royalty gets some say,” said James. “Drive, please.”
Xavier pulled away from the curb and pressed his foot to the accelerator. “You had fun?” he asked.
“I finger-fucked her,” said James dryly. “In the House of Commons.”
“You have no heart.” I turned in my seat to face him. “You don’t know what love is.”
He focused on the view of the Thames.
“You’ve gone rogue,” I blurted out.
“Know what’s criminal? Politicians using war for their own political advantage. When they have a sketchy history it’s easy for a foreign country to control them. Some men will do anything to get the attention off of them after a scandal, including and not limited to starting a war.”
“It still seems unfair.”
“We know things, Em,” James said, his tone firm.
“You play the all powerful role?”
“I don’t play it. I am it.”
Xavier glanced at us in the rearview. “Do your Jamaican accent for Em.”
“Seriously?” snapped James.
“Yes, I want Em to see your playful side.”
“It’s retired.” James tugged on his shirt sleeves. “Along with my patience.”
I studied his face. “You like playing God, or more accurately, the Devil. What made you that way, Earl Ballad?”
“I don’t know. Why don’t you reflect on that in silence?”
“Honesty,” I whispered. “That’s all I’ve asked for.”
He looked out the window again, and ran a hand through his hair. “I need to keep you safe. There’s a balance between that and giving Xavier what he wants. What I want.”
“You want there to be an us?” I asked wistfully.
James looked conflicted. “Our time together is…”
“What are you afraid of?” I reached for him.
He swept my hand away. “This is futile. You are futile, Em.”
“Have you ever loved anyone?” I seethed.
He glared at me. “I loved my wife.”
“And you divorced her.”
