Page 60 of Tee’d Up For Trouble

“Found her,” Jax announced as Geraldine pushed past him, beaming like she’d just won the lottery.

“Where was she?” I braced for whatever ridiculous answer was coming.

“In the church,” Jax replied, barely holding back a laugh as he came behind the bar.

“What?” I blinked.

“Yeah, barking at the holy water like it owed her money.” He wrapped an arm around me, dropping a casual kiss on my lips like this was how we did things. It felt a bit too good. In fact, so good that I had to resist the urge to push him away.

“She has an excellent sense of judgment,” Geraldine sniffed, cuddling Poppy like the poor thing hadn’t been causing chaos all morning.

I filled up a bowl of water and handed it to Geraldine. She sat with Poppy on her lap and held the bowl to the dog, who lapped at it, looking mighty pleased with herself.

“Poor sweet girl, you must’ve been so frightened,” she cooed as Poppy barked proudly.

“And the snake?” I asked, glancing at Jax.

“That’s the other part of the story.” His grin widened. “Guess where Fergus was hiding?”

“Oh, feckin’ hell,” Liam Murphy muttered, leaning on the bar. “Where?”

Jax gestured toward Seamus, who burst in just then, red-faced and panting, holding Fergus like a proud father holding his firstborn. The snake was draped around his shoulders, calm as could be.

“In my feckin’ oven,” Seamus announced triumphantly.

The pub went silent for a split second, and then the laughter that followed nearly shook the walls.

“In your oven?” Liam Ryan shook his head in disgust or despair—I wasn’t sure which.

“Aye!” Seamus puffed his chest out like he’d just discovered America. “Snug as could be, wrapped up near the pilot light.” He looked at Fergus lovingly and scratched his head like the snake was a dog. “He likes the heat, don’t ya, boy?”

“Seamus O’Shea, get that thing out of my pub,” I said as calmly and clearly as I could.

“Ah, come on, Dee, you can’t?—”

“Out of the pub,” Saoirse cried out, running to the far end of the pub, away from Seamus and his feckin’ snake.

“Get him away from us.” Geraldine held onto a growling Poppy as tightly as she could.

I groaned, rubbing my temples.

“Jesus Christ,” Liam Murphy muttered. “That snake’s got more sense than you, Seamus.”

The snake wiggled and almost slipped away.

Saoirse climbed on top of a table. “Seamus, you let that snake out of your hands, and I swear on everything holy, I’ll get Ronan’s butcher knife and?—”

That was when Fergus did get away, and there was a lot of yelling and screaming and standing on tables until Seamus got the offending reptile.

Jax had his head on my shoulder, his body quaking with laughter.

“And don’t you bring Fergus anywhere near my pub again, Seamus!” I barked as he was leaving. “I don’t care if he’s vegetarian, carnivorous, or feckin’ allergic to fresh air—keep him in his tank!”

Seamus grinned sheepishly but didn’t argue. “Aye, aye, Captain. I’ll lock him up safe and sound.”

“Do it now,” I pointed to the door. “I’ll even buy you a pint next time if you get out of here quickly.”

Seamus turned, cradling Fergus like a baby, and headed for the door. “Come on, lad. Let’s get you home before you scare anyone else.”

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