Page 45 of Changing Tides

It takes me a few minutes on Sunday morning to realize what I have done. First, I’m greeted by the familiar migraine that comes with too much tequila. The bright sunlight is assaulting me because I never closed my shades last night, making everything worse. I am lying in my bed, trying to remember how I got home. There was definitely an Uber ride. Liam was there. I remember being annoyed when he showed up at the bar. In my drunken state, I thought Miles would be the perfect rebound hook up for me to forget about James and selling our house. As soon as I saw Liam, I knew I couldn’t hook up with Miles.

I remember Liam standing extra close and moving in when Miles left for the bathroom, making damn sure he marked his territory. After that is where things get hazy for me. I recall asking him to take me home. I even recall being angry at him while waiting for the Uber. Then in the Uber we were holding hands.Did I kiss Liam last night? Or did I just dream that?Wait.Liam wasn’t drinking last night.So, what happened when we got out of the car?

Then it all comes rushing back to me. We were facing each other. I touched him first. I leaned into him and could feel his arousal. I don’t think anything happened though.Why not?I am pretty sure I remember how close we were to kissing. I all but threw myself at him and he turned me down.He turned me down.

The realization stings more than I expect it to. I was practically begging him to put his mouth on mine and he saidno.Actually, I think he said, “I can’t.”Why, Liam? Why can’t you?The rejection embarrasses me and makes me angry. I could have had a fun, easy night with new friends. Now I am mortified. And hung over. I groan and turn to face the wall, putting a pillow over my head.

There’s a knock at my door. It’s a soft knock so I almost don’t hear it. Before I answer I glance at the time on my phone. 9 a.m. “Come in, Ellie,” I moan. Surely, Ellie is ready to go flower shopping. Yesterday I told her I’d go with her.

A throat clears. “I’m not Ellie.”

I bolt upright and pull the covers up over my chest. Standing in front of me with two lattes is a tentative looking Liam, awkwardly shuffling his feet, his eyes darting anywhere but directly at me. I wonder if he slept at all. He looks as bad as I feel, with dark circles under his eyes and a pained expression, but he took the time to get me a coffee.

“I brought you coffee…and some Advil.” He sets both down on the nightstand next to my bed. “I thought I’d stop in here before I grab Lucy from Ellie. They’re out on a walk.” Then he gestures to my bed. “May I sit?” He is so gorgeous even when he’s clearly exhausted.

I shrug humbly.I’m a goner for this man. Coffee and medicine, but the jerk wouldn’t kiss me last night when I was basically begging him to?Maybe it’s a peace offering so I’ll still be his babysitter.I can’t look at him when I speak. “I’ll still watch Lucy for you, Liam, if that’s what this is about.” I force myself to meet his gaze.

His brow knits together. He opens his mouth to speak and then closes it again. Then he sits down by my feet. “That’s not what I came here to talk about.”

I look down at my hands. “Oh,” is all I can get out.

“Sophie, look at me.” He pats my foot. I raise my eyes to meet his gaze. “Last night…I should have probably minded my own business, but the thing is…I feel like youaremy business.” He sighs and runs his fingers through his hair, possibly a nervous tick.

I don’t know what to say so I wait for him to continue.

“The thing is, I am so attracted to you, Sophie.”

Well, that makes me feel better.Blood rushes to my cheeks. I want to grin like a lovesick fool, but I don’t; I bite my lip to hide it.

Liam continues, “But look, you’ve just been through something hard. And I haveneverbeen in a serious relationship. Like…never. I don’t know how to do it.” That must be hard for him to admit because I notice the tips of his ears turning pink. “I don’t want to hurt you if I start something before I’m really ready.”

My surprise must be evident because he smiles.

“I’m serious. And I really like our friendship, and I like spending time with you. I liked yoga so much the other night. I’ve never spent time with a woman and had it be so easy.” He stands up and begins walking in circles around the room, like he’s having an argument in his head that I’m not privy to.

“What about Melanie?” I ask, genuinely curious.

“Melanie is…that’s different. I spent so much time with Melanie becauseeverythingwas hard, not because it was easy. I know that won’t make sense to you… I don’t know what she told you.” He runs his hands through his messy hair again, and I want to pull him onto the bed with me. Before I can say anything else, he continues. “I just think if I hooked up with you now, it would be for the wrong reasons… Sexual attraction is obviously present between us. But you’re not in a good place and hooking up with you because I’m jealous is exactly what the old Liam would do.” He sits back down on the bed and looks at me earnestly. “I am not rejecting you,” he says softly. “I just think it’s not the right time. Does that make sense?”

Tears burn the back of my eyes, and I don’t know if it’s because I still feel rejected, if I am sad that my marriage is over and I’m actuallyinthis position, or if I am happy to have found a friend in Liam. I sniffle and the ugly cry is threatening in the back of my throat. All I can do is nod. I sniffle again and Liam reaches for a tissue from the box on my nightstand.Was this man sent from heaven? Imayhave misjudged him.

“Can we be friends?” he asks, and he is so hopeful I can’t resist him. “Please. I need someone to go to yoga with today.”

I laugh through my tears and it comes out as a snort. I still want to tear his clothes off, but I think he’s right about the timing. I suddenly feel anxiety creep up in my chest when I remember my Irish goodbye. “Melanie is going to hate me now if she thinks I left with you.”

Liam rolls his eyes. “Melanie is a pain in my ass. But you’re fine. I told everyone you were sick from all the tequila.” He gives me a wry smile.

I lay back on my pillows. “That’s not far from the truth.” I moan, reaching for the Advil he brought. He hands it and my bottle of water to me, then he stands to go.

“Why don’t you go back to sleep, and I’ll see you later for yoga?” He walks to my windows and closes the shades, then makes for the door.

“Thanks, Liam,” I say, pulling my blankets up higher. I feel much better than when I initially opened my eyes. I close them again and start to relax.

“And Sophie?” Liam’s voice prompts me to look his way. “Please don’t hook up with Miles. It would kill me to find out that nothing could ever happen between us.”

My voice comes out as a whisper. “Okay.”

I can’t wait to call Claire.

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